FanFiction Fridays

Fanfiction Trailer #2

2012-01-27T10:05:00.001-08:00

In a world that was filled with lies and deceit, one kid set off on an epic adventure...

Wait, this sounds like every other fantasy out there! Do over, please?

A group of freinds are banding together in order to stop runaway magic that is gripping the nation. Will they succeed?

Title of story to be determined.

Jacquel Rassenworth does Percy Jackson

2012-01-27T07:47:00.000-08:00

What happens when Jacquel Rassenworth ends up meeting the Greek gods?

Jacquel Rassenfinds herself waking up in a strange place. She sees several people that she had never seen before. A boy named Elijah Spears claims to be her boyfriend. A girl named Camille Gamble claims to be her best friend. Three other boys named Arthur Lane, Corey Maddox, and Robbie Hale claim to be her half-brothers.

But that's not the least of it.

Jacquel is claimed to be Ginger Page and her father is not Nicholas Rassenworth, but one of the Greek gods. Namely, Zeus, that was.

Ginger ends up at Camp Half-Blood, when there's a fight to keep her safe from the monster that was trying to destroy her. She discovers that there is a war happening between the Greek gods and the Titans, and she is also one of the prophesied heroes who could save the world...or destroy it.

And you thought that she had caused enough trouble in Harry Potter.

Name of story to be determined.

Related articles, courtesy of Zemanta:

Fantasy Roast #1

2012-01-20T07:47:00.000-08:00

The Roasting of Frodo Baggins

As seen on Fantasy Central

December 18, 2011

(laughter erupts from the Party Field in the Shire. There is a large group of people on stage sitting in the bleachers. Frodo Baggins is sitting on a huge chair in the middle of the stage. There are many more people in the audience, both Hobbits and humans. Saruman is at the microphone telling crazy jokes about Frodo.)

Saruman: I don't know why, but somehow, a little Hobbit has destroyed a ring when I could have done it myself. (audience laughs) Frodo, you've beaten me so many times, it's like I'm so old that I went to high school with Gandalf...wait, I already have! (audience laughs and applauds. Sam Gamgee goes to the microphone)

Sam: Thank you, Saruman, for those rather touching jokes. And next up, we have Percy Jackson from "Percy Jackson & the Olympians"! (audience applauds as Percy goes to the microphone)

Percy: Frodo, you may be a little Hobbit, but you had the guts to do what you did. If it were me, I'd hand the ring to Kronos and have him and Sauron duke it out while we watch.

Luke: Which would be a bad idea because then other bad guys would jump in claiming the ring and then they would all be in a fight. You would have destroyed every villain in fantasy without even knowing it.

Frodo: And yet, life would be kind of ironic, seeing as the ring is still there and the bad guys are not.

Sam: That would be freaky...(just then, a very rude guest cuts in)

Megatron: Hey, this is unfair! I want to roast Frodo too! Why can't I join in?

Frodo: Because you would insult all humanity and try to make us all slaves. So there!

Megatron: I hate you, you annoying little rabbit!

Laurent: Hey, I resent that remark!

Sam: Let's move on, shall we? The next person to roast Frodo shall be Eragon from the Inheritance Cycle. (audience applauds as Eragon goes to the microphone)

Eragon: I don't know why I'm saying this, but your lack of dragons is insulting. I have never been so angry at the Lord of the Rings as I am now. Your uncle was an idiot for getting that dragon killed when he could have rode it into battle and fried all those orcs...

Danny: Hey, shut up! You have no right to insult him for what his uncle did! His uncle is a hero and they both deserve your respect!

Eragon: And what about you, Little Miss Dragon Bitch? You think you're so special just because you happened to hatch three dragons...

Drogo: Hey, bub, how dare you insult my wife! You have no clout!

Sam: I don't know about you, but what I do know is that some people just love to bash the past. Ok, next up, she may not have faced a dragon, but I know she's been through more crap than most normal girls. Please welcome Lyra Belacqua! (audience applauds as Lyra goes to the microphone.)

Lyra: Frodo, I know for a fact that you have faced many dangers, but still, facing the prospect of failure is enough to motivate even the most doubtful of people. And for that, I salute you.

Eragon: Really? You're saying that you'd rather pay homage to a Hobbit than to a brave Dragon Rider who saved his country from an evil tyrant?

Percy: Oh, please! You call yourself a hero? Well, I'm not buying that for a second! You have to get your stupid dumbass in danger and everyone wants to use you for their own ends!

Katniss: At least I take care of my own issues without the help of a dragon! Dragons are for pussies!

Aragorn: Yeah! And also, the hero gets the girl; but you ended up with a dragon. What kind of guy are you?

Frodo: Is this the Frodo Roast or the Eragon Bash?

Merry: Don't worry. Pippin and I will take care of this. (goes to microphone, where the roasters are hurling insults at each other and claps two microphones together. The arguing stops as everyone covers their ears to block the annoying sound.) Well, for all your yelling at Eragon, you're forgetting that Frodo is strange in his own way.

Pippin: I mean, you should see his ring collection. He has a ring fetish! (audience laughs)

Frodo: Pippin!

Merry: And there's also that thing with Sam. I bet they're gay for each other, if you know what I mean...

Sam: Really, Merry? You just HAD to announce that to everyone here?

Merry: Well, what else explains why you two are so fricking close?

Pippin: I bet they enjoy sharing the same bed...

Audience: Ooooohhhh...

Sam: That's quite enough, you two! So Frodo has a thing for rings, why would he not? I think he regrets throwing away the One Ring, even though he did and saved Middle Earth. And as for the gay thing, I believe that Merry and Pippin are rather insane for saying such things as that. It's not like we short guys don't have a love life. Speaking of short people, the next speaker may not have a nose, but I'm sure he has more guts in his feet than the rest of you have in your own bodies. Please welcome Tyrion Lannister from "Game of Thrones"! (audience applauds as Tyrion goes to the microphone)

Tyrion: Frodo, Frodo, Frodo, what can I say about you? You must have had some serious guts to do what you did or you're rather foolish. But enough of that. Sometimes, I wonder if you seriously knew what you were getting yourself into when you took that quest; I certainly would have requested another person to do it, namely my brother Jaime...

Jaime: Oh come on, Tyrion, really?

Tyrion: Yes, really! Hopefully, that'll keep you away from our bitch of a sister! (Cersei growls at him) Anyway, back to my original thought: your story has set the standards for all fantasy stories, though none of them will ever attain the status that the Lord of the Rings has in terms of popularity...(here, he is rudely interrupted by Harry Potter, who forces his way onto the stage)

Harry: Oh ha ha ha ha ha! Everybody *LOVES* Frodo! He's the big-time hero! But what about me? I'm Harry Potter, the greatest fantasy character ever!

Charlie Bone: Yeah right! You suck and your books are nothing but crap!

Harry: But why does everyone think that Frodo is great? I should be the hero! After all, I do magic, I beat a bad guy, I even get a girl...

Meggie: No you don't; you just get someone else's sister! (several people boo and hiss)

Harry: Oh what do you know, you stupid bookworm? It's not like you can't read up a guy who's so much better than me!

Meggie: I don't need to; in fact, he's right up on stage in front of you!

Katniss: Frodo is so much better than you!

Danny: I concur.

Harry: But...but I'm better than him! I'm smarter than him! I'm bigger than him!

Bella: Not where it counts! (audience laughs)

Sam: Harry, I think you need to leave now. (at this, two security guards arrive and firmly escort Harry off the stage) I guess someone's popularity just took a nosedive after the "Hunger Games" trailer was released, huh? (audience laughs) And now we have a final word from Frodo...(Frodo goes to the microphone)

Frodo: Thank you everyone for your off-colored jokes about me. And now I must say, I may have been the It Boy for the past 50 years, but that doesn't mean that my story can't influence many more generations of readers. But what I see up here on stage is rather astounding: some creepy trolling wizard, a pissy dragon boy, a girl who's obsessed with vampires, and a dwarf who can't even come up with a good joke to save his life. I must be on some kind of crack reality show or something like that. Just remember how and why you got to where you are now... because of me! Payce out, y'all! (he leaves the stage. applause from audience. Credits roll)

Related articles, courtesy of Zemanta:

Fanfiction Trailer #1

2012-01-13T11:32:00.000-08:00

(the following fanfic is rated PG-13)

Coming soon to a fanfiction website near you...

A car accident in New York.

3 friends stranded in the middle of nowhere.

A doom that threatens to tear apart the world.

Jacquel Romanov, Ron Weasley, and Hermione Granger are now stuck in the world of Percy Jackson & the Olympians after a tragic accident sends them to Camp Half-Blood. But they can't relax, for there are shocking rivalries, cruel titans, and even a huge secret regarding Ron's true origins.

So get ready for an adventure unlike any other!

Name of fanfic to be determined

Related articles, courtesy of Zemanta:

Strange Things Happen in Bone Academy Chapter 1

2012-01-13T09:50:00.000-08:00

Charlie Bone woke up back in his room. It had been at least several hours since the showdown with Harry Potter, and because of that, Manfred had lost his father and grandfather.

The other boy was in his room, still asleep, or sulking, as Charlie had seen him do the last few hours. Charlie didn't blame him much.

He jumped out of bed and ran straight down to the ktchen. Everyone else was dwn there; the excitement over Lyell Bone's return had yet to die down. Charlie was a bit surprised when Maisie shoved a plate piled high with food at him.

"You must be hungry after everything that has happened last night," said Maisie. Charlie nodded. "And when that boy tried to attack you..."

Paton said, "I don't think he wants to talk about that right now, don't you, Charlie?"

Charlie said, "What's to talk about? That kid is evil. There's no doubt in my mind that he must be stopped. End of story."

"But what about that strange girl?" said Amy. "That girl who showed up?"

Charlie said, "I'm not sure if we should trust her or not. After all, she *did* hang out with Harry and all..."

"Being careful is not in your vocabulary," said Maisie, "but this is a first. You would mistrust someone you barely know?"

Charlie said, "I'm sure she'll find a way to get back at me for what I did to him."

Paton frowned. "I thought that we were supposed to lure her away from her friends," he said.

"We did," said Charlie. "Or rather, Tancred and Lysander did. But now that it's all over, I think she'll turn on us and try to destroy us for kidnapping her."

Griselda walked into the room, saying, "Tell me this isn't true. Is Charlie losing his nerve?"

"I still have my nerve, thank you very much," Charlie shot back.

"I'm not convinced," said Griselda as she stared at him. Charlie said, "I do know of what happened last night; no need to convince me otherwise. But still..."

"We'll cross that bridge when we reach it," said Paton. They all looked up and saw Manfred Bloor staring at them. He had a mean look on his face. There was no need to talk to him at all.

Without a word, he plopped down in a chair and began eating. Charlie had over 100 things to say to him, but how does one go about giving out condolences to someone that they didn't like? Especially since it concerned said person's father?

Charlie stood up, made his excuses to everyone, and rushed upstairs. something told him that he should not be down here right now.

------

Jason Rutherford was on his way to Darkly Wynd. He had an appointment to keep. It this meeting succeeded, then he could go on with his plan. But there were two complications: one, would his children appreciate this new plan, and #2, what was he going to do about a certain young girl who suddenly showed up at his apartment last night?

Eustacia noticed him and said to him, "You're just in time, Jason. We were getting worried that you might not show up at all. Vennie is most excited."

"I'm sure she is," said Jason. "After all, not just anyone is allowed to marry into the Yewbeam family."

"Indeed," said Lucretia. "Anyway, about the girl..."

"You know about her?" said Jason.

"We all do," said Venetia. "After all, she had been spellbound for several years. How old is she now? 11? 12?"

"14," said Jason even though the mystery girl was about 13 years old. "We don't know what to do with her."

"I think she should be sent to us," said Lucretia. "If she is endowed, then we would be on hand to help guide her. No endowed child is allowed to run around in the city unchecked."

"I see," said Jason. "But there is the matter of your sister, Griselda. She does not accept me."

"She will, once she has knowledge of the boy," said Venetia as she leered at him. "You have my word."

"Indeed," said Eustacia. "But now there's the manner of the school. The Bloors are no longer in charge, and Manfred is only 19. I figure that we take over."

"A great idea," said Jason. "You know, due to recent events, we're going to have to keep a close eye on those endowed students. There's no teling of what they might do."

Lucretia smiled. Even though she wasn't keep on the idea of this young man marrying her sister, he did share a lot of their views. There was a sister to find and a school to run. She had plans for the school.

And there might be one Charlie Bone who could easily undo all those plans.

Related articles, courtesy of Zemanta:

Demigods Rock part 2

2012-01-13T07:47:00.000-08:00

Image via Wikipedia

(Scene takes place at Camp Half-Blood. Percy Jackson, Annabeth Chase, Grover Underwood and Luke Castellan are in Percy's cabin)

Percy: Now that we're all here, I have some issues that we need to work out.

Grover: Like what?

Percy: Those kids. the ones who showed up in the last story.

Annabeth: Why do we need to deal with them?

Percy: They're annoying!

Luke: What? Like those Annoying Nomads? (James, Laurent, & Victoria show up)

James: We are not annoying!

Laurent: In fact, we are normal.

Victoria: And because we are normal...

Percy: You guys aren't normal!

Grover: Yeah! You guys caused a lot of trouble in Twilight!

James: We did not!

Luke: Yes you did. You tried to kill Bella.

Grover: You broke the vampire bro code: a vampire bro may not bite another vampire bro's girl!

James: You boys are so stupid you don't know what you're talking about!

Percy: And Laurent was nothing but a jerk and Victoria was a total witch.

Victoria: You better take that back, you stupid boy!

Luke: Oh shut it! You're a witch and you know it!

Annabeth: Can we please ask those kids to show up now?

Percy: No! They're annoying!

Grover: But these are the Annoying Nomads!

James: Uh, we are NOT annoying!

Annabeth: Yes you are!

Percy: Shut up, James!

James: Why don't you, water boy! (Katelyn, Victoria, and Claude show up)

Katelyn: Oh no you didn't just insult him!

James: Stupid girl...

Katelyn: Did I say that you can talk?

James: Uh...

Katelyn: Now you better get to stepping off right now or else I'll develop a bad attitude!

Laurent: You heard her, James, we must leave now or else she'll hurt us!

James: All right. You brats win this round, but we'll be back! (the Nomads leave)

Victoria (O'Neil): What a jerk!

Claude: I'm surprised that they went easy on him!

Katelyn: They didn't.

Percy: AAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!! Every time I try to do something decent, you three come here and screw it up!!! (he storms out the cabin in anger. Luke, Annabeth, and Grover all stare at each other.)

Annabeth: He wil never learn, won't he?

Grover & Luke: Seaweed brain!

Katelyn: Don't call him that!

Related articles, courtesy of Zemanta:

The True History of the Cullen Family, Chapter 15

2012-01-06T07:47:00.000-08:00

Runaway Love

Jasper was beginning to wish that he was anywhere but with the Volturi.

He was tired of having to deal with them and their nonsense. And besides, why would he want to put up with them when he had a pet to play with.

Jasper made his way to his room, where Jacquelyn and the snakes were. Both Gus and Minerva were asleep in their baskets and Jacquelyn was sitting in a tub filled with cold water. She was not feeling well and she needed to cool down before she got sick.

Jasper saw her sitting in the tub and said, "Are you not feeling well?"

"No," she said. She shifted herself so that she was facing him. "Why are you with them?" she asked.

Jasper paused; no one had asked him that question before. Sure he had no where to go when the Volturi executed Maria for causing undue trouble in the south, but he knew that he should have gone with Peter and Charlotte when he had the chance to. But when Chelsea persuaded him to come with her and join the Volturi, Jasper knew better than to refuse.

He frowned and stood up, scooping Jacquelyn out of the tub. "You're gonna be catching your death if you sit in there too long," he said as he wrapped the girl in a towel and carried her to the room. Minerva almost woke up upon hearing the noises, but then she relaxed and went back to sleep. Jasper set her on the bed and frowned, not knowing what he should be doing next.

It wasn't that Jasper didn't have any female admirers, but most of them knew better than to get too close to him. Maria had killed any other woman (both human and vampire) who had made the mistake of getting too close to Jasper. But surely he was not one to take advantage of this poor little girl who was in his room; he knew that some vampires had raped and tortured many young women who they lured away from the safety of their homes.

Jasper lifted the towel from Jacquelyn's body. She gripped his hand and said, "No." He stared at her in confusion. "No," she whimpered again.

"I will not hurt you," he said as he watched tears fall from her eyes. Had she been abused? Did anyone harm her? He would find out and then deliver the Volturi's justice to that horrible monster. "Did anyone hurt you?" he asked.

"No," she whispered.

Jasper slipped off his Volturi robes and sat beside Jacquelyn. She grew frightened and curled up away from him. "No," she said. Jasper reached out to take the girl's hand. "You are safe here," he said gently but firmly. "No one is going to hurt you. Please..."

Jacquelyn stared at him for a few moments. How can someone like him---a vampire---possibly keep her safe from harm? Especially since vampires have killed millions of humans over the centuries? She did not understand.

Jasper sighed and reached over to her, saying, "Do not be afraid." Jacquelyn nodded and began crying gently. He stripped down to nothing and held her to him. Jacquelyn frowned, knowing what was going to happen. But was she ready for it?

Jasper said, "Please don't be sad." Jacquelyn nodded and curled up beside him. Would Jasper Whitlock, former Confederate Major from Texas and Guard of the Volturi, be the one to take away her pain?

-----

The Annoying Nomads (James, Laurent, and Victoria) were now somewhere next to Naples. All day and night, they had to listen to humans complaining about the red sky. The sky was so red that it could be seen at night as well as during the day. Many people suspected everything from aliens to the return of Jesus Christ as the reasons why the sky was red.

Laurent said, "I don't know what the people are saying, but I don't like it. They are too full of fear."

Victoria said, "I heard some old woman say that the dead are coming back to life. I hope that doesn't mean that our meals are coming back to haunt us."

"Possibly not," said James. "The sky smells like blood. I'm not sure if we have to feed from humans as much as we usually do."

Just then, a scream was heard. A man was lying dead in the streets of Naples, with some strange symbol on his neck. "Not aliens and not zombies," Victoria said out loud.

"Then what is it?" another man cried out.

"Werewolves," said Laurent as he showed everyone the deep bloody scratches that ran down the victim's back.

Victoria said, "But I thought all the werewolves were dead! Extinct! Everyone knows that the Volturi wiped them out over 4 centuries ago!"

"Actually, that would be the work of Lord Caius," a vampire said, drawing everyone's attention. "After being attacked by a werewolf during an mission trip in the 1200's, Lord Caius set off with an army and marched upon their holdings, where they destroyed the werewolves in their human forms. But some had dared to survive and for countless centuries, they hid among us, plotting their revenge."

"Who are you?" James rudely addressed the vampire.

"My name is Dante Frost," said Dante, "and I'm here to warn you all: he or she who was involved in a murder that was committed out of selfishness will soon meet their deaths at the claws of the wolf."

He stood up and said, "I am going to Volterra to confer with Lord Aro regarding the murder of a man who could have improved life for both humans and vampires alike. Do you wish to share in my quest?"

James frowned, but Laurent said, "We would be happy to. In fact, we were just going there ourselves."

Dante said, "Then we shall depart immediately."

James frowned as he, Laurent, and Victoria walked off with the strange vampire. No one knew that they too were about to be involved in a very dangerous battle...

-----

Jasper slid out of bed, heaving. He knew that it had been years since he had actually enjoyed sex, knowing that it was only with Maria that he had had these intimate encounters. Maria would never let another woman go near him at all.

He frowned as he looked at his human pet, who had fallen asleep shortly after their tumble. She was a virgin, that he knew. Or she was, until a few hours ago. Jasper wondered if instead of comforting her, as he had wished to do, he had actually made things even worse for her.

Just then, Heidi came to the room. She had not seen Jasper lately and she had not seen Jacquelyn since the day that she brought the girl to the Volturi to be Jasper's pet.

She said to Jasper, "Aro did not see you at the meeting yesterday. Where have you been?"

Jasper said to her, "You do know that I have a pet, right?"

Heidi took a look at the sleeping Jacquelyn and said, "Please tell me that you didn't eat her; you do know that with your tastes, girls like her are very hard to find."

Jasper snapped, "I do know how to control myself, thank you very much, but I also prefer my light snacks. If you have a problem with me spending time with my little pet, as much as you go around seducing mortal boys during your time out of the castle..."

Heidi glared at him and Aro walked into the room, saying, "I see that Jasper likes his little pet. But I believe that he has yet to know of the problem that is plaguing us. The Romanians could be using the red sky to launch their attacks upon us. There would be untold amounts of human casualties. We need to put an end to them and quickly."

"We should," said Jasper. "The Romanians could be gathering allies even as we speak. I believe that they will attack us on St. Marcus's Feast Day."

"A repeat of the feat that is for the ages," said Aro. "Our own loyal human followers are in danger. You, Jasper, have the power to save us all."

Heidi said, "Are you saying that Jasper could...you know...use his powers to stop that army from reaching us?"

"How else did we find him?" Aro smiled. He took a look at Jacquelyn and said, "And we would like for her to join us, once she recovers from her devastating illness."

He and Heidi left the room and Jasper stood up. He needed to feed. He walked away from the bed, knowing that Jacquelyn would not wake up until evening. He needed to think of a strategy in order to stop the Romanians and their supporters. He would have to become "Major Jasper Whitlock" again.

Jacquelyn stirred a little, then fell back asleep. Jasper stared at her once more before leaving the room.

Happy New Year!!!

2012-01-01T15:00:00.000-08:00

Now that we have reached the year 2012, I would like to take a moment and fully realize what to expect for the next year in writing:

More original fiction, less fan fiction: that doesn't mean that I will be abandoning fan fiction altogether, but I want to be able to write my own stories and have others read then and write their own fan fiction about them. So I will be saving fan fiction for Fridays, which is when I will be doing my blog, called FanFiction Fridays.
Finishing all stories that I have started on FictionPress.com: some of these stories have been sorely neglected in favor of other stories and they are begging to be finished. But the sequels to the stories might not be written, so who knows what will happen with these stories.
Revamping old stories: right along with finishing these stories, I will be bringing back stories (and characters) that I have abandoned many years ago. What I will do, however, is up to my imagination.

With these three goals in mind, I shall begin the year in writing for 2012. Here we go!

Hear ye, hear ye!

2011-12-28T07:47:00.000-08:00

I have an announcement to make...

It has now been 3 years since I created this blog and I'd like to say that since then, I have surprisingly moved away from the world of fan fiction and into the heart of original stories. Well, I won't be abandoning fan fiction entirely, but I won't be too seeped in fan fiction, either. I will be creating my usual three blog posts, but beyond that, I have no idea of what I will be doing next.

Related articles, courtesy of Zemanta:

Merry Christmas, everyone!

2011-12-25T07:47:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas, everyone!

I hope you have a good Christmas! I'll be back soon!

Related articles, courtesy of Zemanta:

The Kane Chronicles Pledge

2011-12-16T07:47:00.000-08:00

Cover via Amazon

I promise to remember Carter
When I travel far away

I promise to remember Sadie
When I have something sarcastic to say

I promise to remember Desjardins
When someone doesn't fight fair

I promise to remember Amos
When someone has beads in their hair

I promise to remember Iskandar
When I see someone very old

I promise to remember Bast
When I see cat's eyes that are gold

I promise to remember Horus
When I see a beautiful bird

I promise to remember Isis
Whenever strange voices are heard

I promise to remember Set
When someone is clever and sly

I promise to remember Anubis
When a cute boy catches my eye

I promise to remember Zia
When I see someone working magic

I promise to remember Julius Kane
When someone's life is tragic

I promise to remember Ruby Kane
When someone I love is gone

And whenever I read The Red Pyramid
I'll always remember this song.

=======

Related articles, courtesy of Zemanta:

The Percy Jackson Pledge

2011-12-09T07:47:00.000-08:00

Cover via Amazon

(nicked from someone's FanFiction.Net Profile. Repost this if you agree)

I promise to remember Percy
whenever I’m at sea

I promise to remember Annabeth
when a spider comes at me

I promise to protect nature
for Grover's sake, of course

I promise to remember Luke
when my heart fills with remorse

I promise to remember Chiron
whenever I see a sign that says ''free pony ride''

I promise to remember Tyson
whenever a friend says they'll stick by my side

I promise to remember Thalia
whenever a friend is scared of heights

I promise to remember Clarisse
whenever I see someone that gives me a fright

I promise to remember Bianca
whenever I see a sister scold her younger brother

I promise to remember Nico
whenever I see someone who doesn’t get along with others (I always remember him)

I promise to remember Zoe
whenever I watch the stars

I promise to remember Rachel
whenever a limo passes my car.

Yes I promise to remember PJO
wherever I may go

Swear it on the river Styx!

----------

Related articles, courtesy of Zemanta:

I'm Done With NaNoWriMo

2011-12-02T07:47:00.000-08:00

That's right, everyone: I'm officially done with NaNoWriMo!! Within the month of November, I managed to write about 55355 words for my paranormal romance/horror novel, Life, Sin, & Blood.

And the storyline is as folllows: A popular girl who hates vampires and Twilight experiences her own vampire romance.

That's the story! I've now reached 10 chapters in this story and will be taking a short break from the story while I get everything else knocked into place. Hopefully, I will be getting the story completed around either January or February.

And if you want to view a sample of my story, just go to my Smashwords profile and download your free copy.

Related articles, courtesy of Zemanta:

The Twilight Wedding Day Blog Post Extravaganza

2011-11-18T07:47:00.000-08:00

Cover via Amazon

Since Breaking Dawn part 1 the movie is in theaters today (I saw it, I loved it!) I figure I'd do a couple of Twilight-related fics just to show how much I love the Twilight series. So, here we go!

================

Jacob: Hello, and welcome to the Twilight Wedding Day Blog Post Extravaganza!! I'm going to be telling you all about what happened on the day that Edward and Bella got married.

Seth: And also, did you know Jacob was caught making out with some random girl at the reception?

Leah: And I thought you cared about Bella!

Jacob: Why you guys so mean?

Leah: Shut it, Jake!

Seth: Anyway, here's what happened at the wedding:

-----

BREAKING DAWN WEDDING

Leah: Wasn't that a great wedding?

Jacob: Too bad Bella's going to become a bloodsucker's wife. She should have chosen me; I could have given her so much more.

Leah: Get over yourself, Jake. Bella never would have chosen you; she just wanted you as a friend. Or would you like me to tell you what Seth saw?

Jacob: What?

Leah: Seth told me you decided to trick Bella into kissing you in order to stop you from killing yourself.

Jacob: So what? I wasn't going to let her just run off and marry that stupid Edward!

Leah: Grow up, Jacob! You can't just force a girl to like you. If Bella had liked you, then you wouldn't be acting stupid, now would you? And if Edward were in your position, he'd let her choose whoever she wanted. So shut up and give up.

Embry: Oh-ho, BURN!!

Jacob: At least I'm not a bastard child.

Embry: WHAT DID YOU SAY???

BBella: Jake! Were you trying to skip out on my wedding?

Jacob: Bella, are you and Edward going to have kids?

Charlie: Well, are you?

Edward: I hope not.

Esme: Why not?

Edward: I don't know if I would be a good father.

Carlisle: But I am a good father, Edward. And I know for sure that you and Bella would be great parents.

Billy: We must see what your kid looks like. All in favor of an Edward-Bella baby?

Crowd: (cheers)

Bella: Jacob, if you mess this up like you did in the book, I won't hesitate to beat you up.

Sam: And we're not going to help you this time, Jake.

Leah: Yeah, so no imprinting on the kid or I'll destroy you and beg her forgiveness later.

Seth: Yup, so you better shut up and let nature take its course.

-----

Jacob: Well, we can't describe to you the honeymoon or the hot bedroom scenes; Sue would kill me if Seth saw the video, but anyway, here's the real story about what happened in Breaking Dawn...

-----

CULLEN HOUSE

Bella: I'm tired, I'm depressed, and I feel so...FAT!!! (bursts into tears)

Rosalie: Don't worry, I'm sure it will end well for you.

Bella: Shut up, you disgusting blond bimbo! I can't believe you doomed Emmett to a life of vampirism just because he reminded you of little Henry! That's disgusting!

Leah: Yeah, tell her, Bella!

Bella: And when that baby is born, I want you OUT of here! (Charlie shows up)

Charlie: Hi Bells. What's new?

Bella: I'm fatter than Aunt Faye, that's wassup!

Charlie: Don't feel too bad, Bella.

Bella: Really? (just then, she goes into labor) Edward? I think the baby's coming!

Edward: Indeed. Somebody find Carlisle; we've got to seal off the house and make sure that any witnesses don't throw up. (Carlisle shows up and they rush Bella to the back of the house)

Charlie: Is she going to be OK?

Billy: Let's hope so.

-----

Jacob: Well, let's just say that this part will cause some people to snicker...

Seth: But what about Renesmee?

Leah: Don't worry, she'll be in the story as well.

-----

(Carlisle walks into the living room, where Cullens and Quileutes alike have gathered)

Charlie: So, what's the damage?

Carlisle: It's a girl...and a boy. Bella is doing fine. (all breathe sighs of relief) Would you like to see her now?

Charlie: Yes, we would. (the group gets up and walks into the room where Bella and the babies are)

Seth: Awwww, they're so cute!!

Paul: You think all tiny things are cute.

Seth: Shut up, Paul!

Jacob: (stares at baby Renesmee) Well, the good news is, they're not dangerous.

Sam: But the bad news is, you just imprinted on the girl.

Jacob: Oh come on! Really?

Leah: Well, way to go, Jakey! You managed to eff up the story! Again! (stares at Edward junior)

Edward: His name is Edward junior and he thinks you're very pretty.

Leah: Huh? (just then, the gravity of the situation hits her) Oh no! I imprinted on Bella's baby!

Bella: (glares at everyone) Jacob? Leah? I'm going to kick your asses!!

----

Jacob: And that's the story. Thanks for coming to the extravaganza.

Leah: Now if you'll excuse us, we need to run away before Bella kicks both our butts! (they flee, leaving Seth behind)

Seth: This is unfair, guys! I'm not taking the blame for your screw-ups!

NaNoWriMo once again

2011-11-04T07:47:00.000-07:00

Cover via AmazonDear readers,

NaNoWriMo has come once again, and as always, I end up participating in this event. That means no FanFiction Fridays this month.

However, there will be the "Breaking Dawn" Extravaganza that will be done on Friday, November 18, 2011.

So once again, I won't be posting on this blog until December 2, 2011.

The True History of the Cullen Family, Part 14

2011-10-28T07:47:00.000-07:00

Red Skies at Night

Camille Von Meliskold's life had not been the same since the day that Carlisle Cullen died.

She had gone to Germany and lived there since the botched trial; the judge and mayor had put a huge bounty on her head for killing Carlisle and causing his father to die of grief. Elizabeth Hamilton, her rival (and the woman who should have married Carlisle) married a son of Dagbert Trublood and they had several children. Camille had nearly succeeded in destroying her, had that foolish Englishman not betrayed HER at the courthouse.

She sat by the door listening for the sounds that would end her hours of loneliness and pain. That would be Caroline Von Meliskold, who would be on her way home from school.

After hiding from authorities at her grandmother's house for several years, Camille married a sorcerer named Leopold Darkmoon and had her daughter, Caroline. She also bargained for immortality so that she could continue living even after everyone in her time period was dead.

Caroline walked into the house. Camille ignored her only daughter as she walked by, preferring to devise ways of returning to England without anyone figuring out her crimes. There was still the bounty that was on her head and there were rumors about the murder of Carlisle Cullen that survived 3 centuries after his death. Camille had been a great beauty in her time, with a waterfall of chestnut hair and eyes of scintillating forest-green. She had been blessed with nearly pure white skin, dainty feet, flawless skin, and the ability to charm anyone into doing whatever she wished. Caroline, however, was not so lucky; not with her frizzy blonde hair and blue eyes, her rodent-like face, her large hooked nose, her overlarge ears, and her brutish personality.

Camille knew it was trouble when Caroline had questioned her about why they were living in Germany. For many years, Caroline had wondered why she wasn't beautiful like the other girls and why she never exactly aged like everyone else. Camille said to her, "They did not want us living in England; they had sided with the woman who killed my true love in cold blood and got away with it." She neglected to tell Caroline that SHE had caused Carlisle’s death and tried to frame Elizabeth, but that failed when she was forced to flee from her home in England. Camille refused to tell Caroline that she looked almost like her former rival as well.

She stood up and walked to the window of their huge castle. Once again, Camille was searching for a sign that signaled that it was safe for her to return to England. For many years, Camille had grown bored with living in Darkmoon castle; she had no other children with her but Caroline; Leopold refused to let her have any other children after Caroline’s birth nearly 300 years earlier. He also had no interest in fatherhood, preferring to keep to his alchemy lab. He had agreed to marry Camille as long as she stayed inside the castle.

Just then, the sky turned red. A red sky was not a good thing, as that meant danger. Camille noticed that there were no moon, stars, or even clouds to block the red sky. That was a sure sign that danger was coming.

There would be no returning to England for her.

-----

Aro noticed the red sky and said, "This is not good. Did you know that under a red sky, the dead crawl from their graves and torture the living?"

"Indeed," said Marcus. "Those who died before their time are returning to bring pain to us all."

Caius frowned, saying, "It is only for those damned superstitious mortals; not that we care about any of this. Why should we? We’re vampires, we're immortal, we're above humans! I’m not worried about that at all!"

Aro said, "Or what if this is a sign that something isn't right and we need to fix it before we are all destroyed?"

"Maybe," said Marcus as he left the throne room.

-----

Sam found himself looking at the red sky. "This is bad," he said.

"Will the dead show up like they do in those movies?" Paul asked.

"I don't know," said Sam, "but what I do know is that something is going to happen. What it is, I don't know."

Old Quil said, "The dead, they rise up and torture us! It is those who died before their time that return to taunt those who outlived them. We will see that happen."

Sam nodded, and then said, "Still no word on Billy and Emily?"

"No," said the old man, "but take heart; neither are badly hurt. But our ancestor is still angry and he demands something from us. Something that should have happen that did not happen. That is what Taha Aki seeks."

Paul frowned, wondering why their greatest ancestor was seeking something that was not there. But then again, something needed to be done to save their tribe; they might not survive past the red skies.

Also, some lives were at stake.

-----

Jacquelyn and the snakes were fast asleep in Jasper's room, not knowing that the skies above Volterra had turned red and the air was fraught with the smell of blood. Jacquelyn was still trying to recover from her ordeal and with her trying to help Gus and Minerva, she could not be bothered with the sky changing color at all.

But she would be the one to get what she truly wanted, if she looked past the red sky.

-----

Camille frowned as she searched the skies, but so far, nothing had changed. She began to wonder what it would have been like had Carlisle lived and she married him. There would have been no need to hide in a sorcerer's castle in the woods. She would have gotten rid of Elizabeth for good. She would have gotten the family she had desired rather than the family that she had now.

Just then, the smoke coming over the horizon was spotted. The time had come for judgment and changes…

-----

(We just can't have a Twilight fanfic without the Annoying Nomads, or can we?)

James, Laurent, and Victoria were in the streets of Venice, Italy, having eaten several hours before. They were not too concerned with the red skies, only about having fun and causing trouble for the poor humans.

Laurent said, "Maybe we should head to the next town; there's scores of humans there who won't be missed if they were to disappear."

"I agree," said Victoria. "We need a challenge."

James said, "I say we head off to Volterra; there's lots of people for us to eat there."

So as all three (annoying) nomads made their way to Volterra, they had no idea that their lives were about to be changed forever…

Pretty Little Liars vs. FanFiction.Net Part 4: Emily's Unmentionable Situation

2011-10-21T12:44:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

Emily frowned as she sat at her computer. So far, she discovered that Spencer, Hanna, and Aria had been receiving letters from "A" directing them to FanFiction.Net and exposing them to fan fiction stories written about them. Emily was hoping that the same thing would not happen to her.

Well, if there was a God, He must have been busy and could not hear Emily's prayers.

Emily saw a text from A, which said, "Ah, Emily, my favorite little liar. This site here has claimed us to be lovers. Why don't you have a look-see?"

She logged onto fanfiction.net and scrolled down to PRETTY LITTLE LIARS. There, She noticed a story titled Marndis's Mistress by FaeThunder. Emily clicked on the link and it read "Emily Fields had had a happy relationship with her boyfriend, but will her best friend Alison Dilaurentis take her boyfriend's place?"

"Really?" Emily cried out in anger as she realized that the other girls were going through the same thing. Now it was her turn. She was going to make them pay for it all.

She clicked on the words "send PM to author." She stared at a Gmail address. She then clicked on the address and typed the following message:

"Dear FaeThunder, I am a lesbian; I do NOT want to have a boyfriend. Plus, do you REALLY think that Ali and I would be going out? SERIOUSLY!!! Sincerely, Emily Fields."

Spencer, Hanna, and Aria were at a small cafe when Emily showed up. She said, "Can you believe this person had the nerve to write that crap about me?"

"Who do they think they are?" Hanna cried out.

Spenser said, "Methinks it's time we hit them back. But how?"

Aria said, "I don't know, but we've got to put an end to their shenanigans before our reputations become unrecoverable."

Just then their phones went off. "A," they all cried out as they checked their texts:

Well, girls, I hope you plan on holding on to your seats; it's going to be a bumpy ride! ~A

Emily sighed. Things were really going to be tough for them the next few weeks...

The True History of the Cullen Family, Part 13

2011-10-21T10:43:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

The Madness of Life

Billy and Emily's lives hung in the balance.

Sam and the others freaked out when they found out that Taha Aki discovered what they did to Leah and he decided to punish them for it. They did not know what to do with Leah at all.

Old Quil said, "Well, if you hadn't kicked her out, then none of this would be happening! Their blood is on your hands!"

He didn't stop, but continued to scold everyone in the waiting room until Quil jr stood up and said, "I'll get him home; it's 5:00 and he becomes cranky at 5:00. Keep me posted, ok?"

"Very well," Sam frowned as he watched Quil and his grandfather leave. He knew that it was time for an overdue assessment of himself. Leah was still angry with him, and he had turned their children and everyone else against her.

For once in his life, Sam Uley was unsure of himself.

=====

Jasper frowned as he stood in his place beside Aro. He was wishing that he could be anywhere but the throne room. Aro had called for a meeting with the guards to discuss the future of their world.

"Something is missing," said Aro as he stared at the guards, "but I don't know what it is."

"Why do you suggest this?" said Alec. "There's nothing wrong here."

"I do know that there are bad things that are happening. The world has been thrown out of balance. There is great suffering in the streets. Children have no food or home or hope, and many of them die due to various abuses and whatnot."

"I believe that we should go back to our roots," said Caius. "Once we were the feared monsters of the night. Now we've been turned into something of a laughingstock. I despise any human who dares make fun of me!"

"So let us go back to our old ways, when we ate only the poorest of humans," said Marcus. "They won't be missed at all. We have the largest coven in the vampire world and who would care if a poor person went missing?"

"I don't like that idea, but we happen to have over 300 members here," said Aro, "and not everyone wishes to drink those who have been bad. So once a week, or however often you feed, please bring back any human who exhibits any vampire-like behavior. I will have them turned at once."

"What of the children?" asked Jane.

"We do not create any immortal child, but in case said child displays such tendencies, we shall send them to the wives," said Aro.

Jasper frowned as he headed back to his room. He could not believe that Aro had suggested that they revert to their earlier primitive vampire ways. But on one hand, it would curb the world population some, but then again, it reminded him of his wasted years with Maria.

He reached his rooms and saw Jacquelyn speaking to the snakes. All three seemed to be discussing something rather important, or they would have seen him.

Jasper sat in a chair and thought about what he would do next. He wasn't about to just eat humans randomly like everyone else; his talent of reading/manipulating emotions would not allow him to do that. But a vampire had to feed.

And if he had to find an alternative to humans, so be it.

How Bree Tanner Got Her Life Back Part 2

2011-10-21T07:47:00.000-07:00

At length, everyone had gathered in Carlisle's office. They were all discussing the fate of one Bree Tanner as well as Bella's change. Billy said, "Bring out the girl, so that we may meet her."

At once, Bree walked into the office. Everyone gasped as they looked at her. Sam said, "Did no one offer to help you or anything like that?"

Bree said to him, "Why are you helping me? I could kill you all in a heartbeat."

Paul said, "Well, that may be true, but still, you are a lost soul who needs a friend...and maybe them."

Esme nodded and then said, "We could use someone like you, providing that you will follow our diet and rules."

"She will, or we'll have to destroy you," said Jane with an evil smirk on her face. Sam shook his head and decided that he didn't like Jane at all.

Billy said to her, "So why are you so bent on Bella becoming like...you?"

"She has to, and so do you," said Demetri. "Aro doesn't like it if any human knows about the existence of vampires; he decreed that anyone who know about vampires was to be either killed or turned themselves."

"Well, I’d like to take that up with him," said Billy.

"Indeed you shall," said Alec. "He would very much like to hear about the tribe of shapeshifters."

Carlisle said to Jane, "I heard that you would let Victoria destroy us all. How could you?"

Jane said, "I am sorry; had I known that you were the clan in question, I would not have allowed it. I hope this will not diminish your…friendship with Aro."

"Only he and I can decide that," Carlisle snapped. "Now please leave; you have caused enough trouble for today."

"Very well," said Jane. "But when next we visit, Bella had better be turned. Bree must learn the laws and you shapeshifting dogs…I’ll let Aro deal with you when he comes."

The guards left the house as Billy said, "Well, that went well."

Sam said, "They know about us."

I know about you guys too," Bella snapped back.

"Indeed," said Billy.

Bree looked around her; she had no idea that in less than 18 hours after the big fight, her life had been spared. But she knew that she had some issues to deal with upon her first full day as a Cullen...

Pirates & Vampires & Lies, Oh My!

2011-10-14T09:15:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

THE HARBOR-LA PUSH

At a restaurant on the harbor, Emmett sat at a booth with a shot glass of wine in his hand. Three other men stared at him. Jacquelyn said, "You do realize that vampires can't get drunk, right?"

"If only I could, then I could forget about her," Emmett said sadly.

"Aaaaah, you not be needin' to worry about that wench," said Namard. "She not be worth your time."

"What do you know of this?" Viko snapped at him. "This man has a broken heart. Can you at least show him some compassion?"

"Compassion?" Namard yelled. "You stupid boy, what do you take me for? I not be showing any compassion for those landlubbers!"

"Oh, will you both be quiet?" Harry Clearwater said, feeling quite forgotten. "He needs help."

"Women aren't much for ye, eh?" said Churnkins. To Jacquelyn, he said, "We be searching for you since those wretched fiends stole you from the boat."

"Well, we should go back and confront them," said Viko. "They are not honorable men; they are monsters."

Emmett sighed and ignored the rest of the conversation. He was thinking about how he had become a vampire. Did Rosalie save him just to save his life, or was there some other ulterior motive behind the reason she had saved him? Whatever Jane said about that seemed like nonsense, but was it true? He knew that he would have to confront Rosalie about this, but right now, running away seemed to be the right answer.

----------

VOLTERRA

Aro, Caius, and Marcus met in Marcus's office; Marcus had found out about the creator of the tiny vampires who lived in the tower with the wives and had him destroyed. He also revealed that the Romanian Coven was behind the attacks on Jamey Walsh, Poppy & Pansy Brunswick, and Peony Hildebrandt.

"So, we have the Romanians, who blatantly disregarded our rules and created these four little things?" Caius said. "Why did you not destroy them when you had the chance?"

"You needed to hear this," said Marcus. "They planned to unleash the children upon the unhappy human world."

"Such a shame," said Aro. "They will surely be destroyed for this. But how to get rid of them? They have many allies, both humans and vampires. How will we stop them if it was known what we have done to Jacquelyn Cullen?"

"Now would be the right time to talk to Carlisle Cullen and get his input on this matter," said Aro as he picked up the phone. "But even then, he will get on our case regarding the poor girl."

"As always," said Caius as he turned to see Sulpicia, Athenodora, and the four little vampires staring at them.

----------

CULLEN HOUSE

The entire house was a mess.

Jane and Rosalie had gotten into a fight and since then, Jane was not happy. She had exposed a harsh truth about Rosalie and Emmett had overheard that truth. He ran off in anger.

Alec said to her, "Is this true? Did Rosalie plan to steal Jacquelyn's babies?"

"Would I put it past her?" said Felix.

"After all, did Jane not say to her "I bet you're glad she got knocked up; you just want to take her baby"? I bet Rosalie was planning to take the babies as soon as they were born," said Demetri.

"So, shall we inform Aro that Jacquelyn has gone missing?" said Alec.

"Are you freaking kidding me?" said Demetri. "Aro canNOT know about this! Plus, what if some other vampire finds out about this? They could hold Jacquelyn hostage and have some kind of leverage over him."

"And also, the Romanians could kidnap Jacquelyn and force those babies to fight against us," said Jane. "Now, that would not be good."

"So what do we do?" cried Esme. "Jacquelyn is vulnerable and fragile. She should be preparing to give birth, not running off. We must find her."

"Well, it's impossible to find her," said Bruce and he and Wayne came inside. "She apparently covered her tracks. And who knows how many minds she wiped clean."

Carlisle said, "We have to find her and fast. And if we find Emmett, that would be better. "Now let's go!"

The Cullens and guards rushed out the house, completely unaware of a phone which rang incessantly...

--------

FORKS POLICE STATION

"So you're telling me that Henry Johnstone climbed the tree near Bella's window and he fell to his death?" said Charlie.

Wilbert said, "little kids climb trees, and according to your friends Billy and Harry, they saw Henry try to climb the tree when he slipped and fell."

Charlie shook his head wondering why Henry would kill himself over Bella. Even Wendell was smart enough to leave when he still had the chance. But there were more important things for him to worry about.

Mainly Bella.

-------

LA PUSH - JACOB BLACK'S HOUSE

"So let me get this straight?" Edward said to Jacob, "My family is here?"

"But as long as that bitch is here, you can't go back to them," said Jacob.

"Very well," said Edward. "But I would like to see them anyway."

Sam came to the house and said, "Jacob, we have a problem. You must come immediately."

"Why?" said Bella.

"Jacquelyn has gone missing and a human living in Forks has been turned, presumably by her," said Sam.

"Let me go to her," said Edward. "Only I can make her see reason. I know how she really is. She wanted me and only me; she once told a lie about Jacquelyn and it nearly destroyed our family."

"Indeed," said Sam, "but all the same, there's no need for you to go to her, not when she may come to you."

"Then we question her about everything, destroy her, and find the little one," said Jared.

Edward frowned as he watched Jacob leave with Sam, Paul, and Jared. He knew he should be out there, helping to look for Jacquelyn. But until Tanya was caught and dealt with, he was still unsafe.

And then there were his growing feelings for Bella Swan for him to deal with.

Bella Draws Boundaries

2011-10-14T07:47:00.000-07:00

Image by saffirahweb via Flickr

Bella was tired of Edward being so afraid of sex, so she sets out to cure his fears.

Edward was sitting in his room when suddenly Bella burst in. She had an angry look on her face. She said, "Edward Anthony Masen-Cullen, what the hell is your problem?"

"What problem, Bella?" Edward answered with a question of his own.

"Edward Cullen," Bella started, "why is it that you're afraid of sex?"

Edward stared at her for a very long time. He considered making up something crazy, but then he said, "Years ago, I fell in love with a girl. She looked just like you. Her name was Colleen Demarcus."

"Really?" said Bella.

Edward said, "But there was the war, and both Colleen's father and brother were killed and Colleen's mother went insane. My family reached out to her when she needed it."

"So, where are we going with this?" asked Bella.

"As it were, Colleen and I managed to fall in love," said Edward. "And I knew that I wanted to go off to Europe to fight in the war. My mother would not have that at all. She wanted me to stay and attend Juilliard and marry Colleen. My father wanted me to go to Harvard, but marry some other girl."

"But what did Colleen want?" Bella asked.

"All she wanted was for her mother to recover," said Edward. "Her uncle and aunt had to step in and have her mother committed to a mental hospital. They even arranged for Colleen to marry some poor boy so that they could keep her in their midst. But she refused and continued to see me."

"So what happened next?" Bella was still unconvinced.

"My father grew ill," said Edward. "The influenza was getting worse. people were dying left and right. One day, he was taken to the hospital, where he eventually died."

"You must have been devastated," said Bella.

"Things got worse," said Edward. "By the time I had gotten sick, Colleen and I had planned to marry. When that happened, I was too sick to do anything, not even to play the piano. Colleen was banned from seeing me, lest she get sick as well. Anyway, you know the rest of the story."

Emmett came in overhearing the story. He said, "Wow, Eddie. Didn't think you had another girlfriend before Bella here."

"Emmett, get out," Bella said as she threw a pillow at him. "Edward is in pain right now."

"That's why I'm afraid to simply be with you," said Edward. "It just brings back...too many painful memories."

"Awww, what's wrong with Ed-weird?" Jacob mocked. "Is he scared of commitment?"

"JACOB, OUT!!!" Bella yelled as she hurled a pillow at him.

"I was just saying..." Jacob cried out as the pillow hit him in the face.

"Which reminds me," said Emmett, "we have some little guests downstairs. Esme is entertaining them as we speak."

"Really?" Edward gave him a weird look as they all walked downstairs. There, in the kitchen, they spotted Esme speaking to two small girls and a tiny little boy. "These three children are somehow related to Edward," Carlisle said as he came into the kitchen. "Perhaps our boy here is their grandfather or something like that."

Edward stared at the children. They all had his brown hair and green eyes. "Uhhhh..." he frowned. "What are their names?"

Carlisle said, "Their names are Rosemary, Abigail, and Robert Masen and they just happened to be descended from a certain Colleen Demarcus, who lived in Chicago during the same time that Edward Masen lived there. But it took the social worker several years to actually track down their last living relative, which just happened to be their great-grandfather..."

"Way to go, grandpa!" Emmett cheered, but Bella silenced him with a punch on the arm.

But nothing could compare to Edward's reaction to the three children sitting before him. His great-grandchildren. His descendants. Colleen must have had a child after his apparent "death" and that son had a son, who had the children.

Rosalie, Jasper, and Alice were in the living room when a loud THUMP! was heard. They all rushed into the kitchen and saw Edward lying on the floor. "Ok, what just happened?" said Rosalie.

"He fainted," said Bella.

“Well, whatever it was, I didn’t see it coming,” said Alice.

Bella sighed and watched as Emmett and Jasper lifted him up and took him to the couch. She said to Edward, “Now why can’t we…you know, have sex?”

“You could have children,” Edward moaned.

“Well, there’s nothing wrong with that,” said Carlisle. “In fact, it’s good if you and Bella have some children. Make this family a little bigger. For many years, it’s been just us, and our family has stayed the same. I wonder if I myself had left a line of descendants that I don’t even know about…”

“Yeah, about that,” said Jacob. “I just happened to see a bunch of young boys who look suspiciously like Emmett…”

Rosalie glared at him and he said, “What? If Edward has descendants, when why can’t I?”

Bella sighed and shook her head; the Cullen family was certainly getting bigger. But for some reason, her original question was never answered.

Demigods Rock!!!

2011-10-07T10:29:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

(Scene takes place at Camp Half-Blood. Percy Jackson, Annabeth Chase, Grover Underwood and Luke Castellan are in Luke's cabin reading fanfiction)

Percy: I see that there is a mock up of Charlie Bone on FanFiction.Net.

Grover: I know! Aren't they funny?

Percy: Yeah, they are. But we have a problem.

Annabeth: Like what?

Percy: There is no mockup about us!

Luke: Really?

Percy: We're popular, we make the Greek gods cool, so why can't WE got a mockup???

Grover: We don't need any mockups; just good old-fashioned comedy!

Percy: Like how?

Luke: Let's hire some really annoying people to annoy the crap out of you!

Annabeth: Like who on earth would want to annoy Percy? (three crazy children step out of the computer and wave to him)

Victoria O'Neil, Katelyn Gwen McKnight, & Claude Foster: Hi, Percy!

Percy: AAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!! (he storms out the cabin. Luke, Annabeth, and Grover all stare at each other.)

Annabeth: This was a bad idea, right?

Grover & Luke: You said it.

(Thus begins the adventures of the three rather insane children who invaded the world of Percy Jackson...)

Jacquel Rassenworth is Up to Her Old Tricks Again!

2011-10-07T08:51:00.000-07:00

Looks like our favorite heroine can't stop causing trouble for everyone!

First, she destroyed Harry Potter. Then she ruined the Twilight Saga. Next, there were rumors of her causing trouble in the world of Pretty Little Liars.

But now we have heard that Jacquel Katherine Nicole Rassenworth is planning a full-scale invasion of three of the biggest fantasy book series out there today: Percy Jackson & the Olympians, Charlie Bone/Children of the Red King, and the Hunger Games!

Here's what happened to her so far:

In Harry Potter, Jacquel masquerades as Harry's younger sister April Dawn and basically causes trouble for everyone at Hogwarts, from tearing Harry away from his friends, Ron and Hermione, to even humiliating the Dark Lord Voldemort himself.
In Twilight, Jacquel Rassenworth is a victim of a prank gone wrong. She is then changed into a vampire and renamed Sam(antha) Silver. She spends 100 years as part of a rogue and vicious vampire clan until our favorite vampire family arrives to set her free.
In Pretty Little Liars, Jacquel Rassenworth plays the part of a feisty 16-year-old girl named Jennifer Thornton, who lives in the fictional town of Peachside, Virginia. She and her 3 best friends Charlotte Stevenson, Lydia Hunter, and Mallory Salas are reeling after their friend/ringleader, Kristine McIntyre, disappeared and was later found dead. Jennie and the other girls soon find out that someone has been taunting them with secrets and ending them with the letter K, secrets that only Kristine knew.

And now for the new stories regarding her:

In Percy Jackson & the Olympians, Jacquel plays the part of Ginger Page, a 15-year-old girl who discovers that one of her parents is a Greek God, and she is dragged into two separate wars, one between the Gods and Titans, and another, which tests out her own strength as a demigod.
In Charlie Bone/Children of the Red King, Jacquel plays the part of Noemi Delaney, a 14-year-old girl living with her uncle and aunt in Glasgow, Scotland. After the events of Charlie Bone & the Red Knight, Noemi is sent to Bone Academy on a scholarship. But there are new troubles and an old enemy attempts to cause trouble once again!
In the Hunger Games, Jacquel plays the part of 15-year-old Jasmine Goldcaster, who is trapped in the Coliseum. She and her friends Dawn Ravenchild, Honor Brandslayer, Leo Bedlam, Melody Witchlance, Ivy Ragetiger, and Drake Ironhunter were to be sacrificed in the Hunger Games. All 7 try to escape, but Leo, Drake, Melody, and Dawn are killed during the first day of the games. During the second day, Jasmine, Honor, and Ivy are the only remaining members of the group. Jasmine runs into Peeta Mellark, who rescues her and the boys. They all meet Katniss Everdeen and join forces to bring an end to the Hunger Games.

Six stories ruined by Jacquel Rassenworth. I guess that's the punishment that she inflicted upon the literary world for destroying her own series several years earlier. Not even Janice Davies is spared from Jacquel's wrath, as she blames the daughter of her creators for ultimately destroying her book series.

Now will someone PLEASE write this girl's story before another book series is ruined?

Related articles, courtesy of Zemanta:

The True History of the Cullen Family, Chapter 12

2011-10-07T07:47:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

Human Behavior

While Jacquelyn Claire Ulrich was fighting to save her sanity, Leah Clearwater was fighting to save her own humanity.

Leah had been banished from La Push several hours before, and she was sure that she was losing her mind. After all, no Quileute had ever stepped out of the reservation and survived.

She was walking along in the woods when she heard a voice. "Leah."

"Dad?" she asked, afraid of what she knew. Her father was dead.

"Leah."

"Who are you?" she cried out as she turned to face the person.

"Why do you abandon your people?" asked the voice.

"Why do they cast me out?" Leah cried out in turn.

Something wasn't right; disembodied voices don't just come out and talk to people, Leah thought to herself as she ran.

"Leah," said the voice. "There is trouble in La Push. Something that has happened that should not have happened, and something that should happened that did not happen."

"What are you talking about?" Leah cried out.

"There is trouble brewing in La Push," said the voice, "trouble that escaped the Elders' reproach. It must be punished. You must return."

"If I return, then they will kill me on sight," Leah protested. "I must flee while I can still run."

"I will correct their mistakes," said the voice. "Now GO!"

----------

Jasper sat there, staring into space. A bath had been drawn and Jacquelyn was nowhere to be found.

Minerva had convinced her to sit in a warm tub full of healing oils in the hopes that she could speed her recovery. Gus was hunting for their meal.

At length, Jacquelyn said to Minerva, "Don't you miss being a human?"

Minerva said, "I would, if only I could remember what it was like to be human. The last thing I can recall was mother whispering an incantation as the snake killed her..."

"Can’t Gus reverse the spell?" Jacquelyn cut in.

"He’s not advanced enough," said Minerva. "He too was turned into a snake. Only an advanced sorcerer can break the spell.”

"There must be books in this place that are dedicated to spells and such," said Jacquelyn. "You and Gus could sneak into the library and find them."

"We could," said Minerva. "They will never notice two snakes crawling around here. But first, you must recover."

Jacquelyn sighed and stepped out the tub. A glance into the mirror showed that she was so pale that her skin was even whiter than milk. She seemed to resemble a vampire. How ironic, she thought to herself. I become obsessed with vampires and now I end up living in a vampire's castle. I even look like one. Life sure has a funny way of irony.

But then again, she knew that come what may, she would have to submit to being an actual vampire.

She reached for her dressing gown and walked out the bathroom.

----------

Old Quil Ataera knew something was wrong when Leah walked into the woods and did not return.

He was among the oldest in the Quileute population, and he had certainly seen better days. This was not one of them. "There is something wrong," he muttered to himself.

Sitting beside him was his grandson, Quil Ataera III. Quil frowned, not approving of Jacob’s handling of Leah Clearwater’s situation. Something had to be done about that.

Just then, a huge black wolf lunged towards them. Old Quil screamed and clutched his grandson as the wolf growled at them. It stared at them for a moment, then bounded towards Emily’s house.

Emily!

Quil Junior quickly helped his grandfather into their house and ran towards Emily’s house. Emily had no idea about the wolves existing, nor did she know about the Quileutes’ connection to the wolves. She was in grave danger…

----------

Jasper was very excited when he saw his pet step out of the bathroom wearing little more than a dressing robe. He said, "Well, little lass, I take it you are healed?"

"Only in body; her mind has a long way to go," said Minerva.

"I see," said Jasper. "Now where did your brother get off to? He said he was to fetch you some snacks, but he hasn't showed up yet."

"I’m here now," said Gus as he crawled into the room. He dropped a huge rat in front of Minerva and said, "If only more vampires ate rats than humans, then this castle wouldn't have such an infestation."

"I see," said Jasper. He stood up and said, "You mind giving her some space?"

"Yes, but we'll be watching you," said Minerva as she pounced on the rat. "She’s still fragile."

Jasper sighed and led Jacquelyn back to the bed. Hopefully a prolonged sleep would do her some good.

--------

Emily smiled as her tiny children ran around the house playing. There was nothing to disturb them.

But for her, a huge wolf growled as soon as it spotted her.

None of the children noticed the wolf as it lunged at Emily. She took off for the gardens, screaming her head off…

Paul heard Emily’s screams and rushed towards Emily’s house. Quil had already reached the house and was blocking the doorway so that the children could not get out.

Sam said, "Emily? Where is she?"

"I found her!" Jared yelled as he rushed back to the house with Emily. She was badly hurt.

"What happened?" Sam cried out.

"I heard her screaming and rushed here," said Paul.

"Does anyone know who caused this?" Jared cried out.

“What happened?” Sue cried out as she came to the house with Seth.

“Emily’s been attacked,” Sam said with a sad look on his face.

--------

Leah saw the wolf and yelled, “Why did you attack my cousin? She did nothing wrong!”

The wolf said, "Sam devoted himself more to her than to his own wife. She had to pay for his sins of abandoning you."

"Who are you?" Leah snapped. "Why are you doing this?"

"I am Taha Aki," said the wolf. "My children have forgotten about their legacy. They have forgotten about me. This is not good. I will make them learn."

Billy saw the wolf talking to Leah. He stood up and shouted, "Leah, run! I'll hold him off..."

But the wolf pounced on him and he screamed in horror...

-------

Jasper inspected Jacquelyn's arms and concluded that there were no carvings or whatnot on her body.

But that didn't mean she wasn't still hurting.

"You all right, little lass?" he asked as Jacquelyn wrapped herself into the robe. She shook her head. Jasper frowned as he clutched to the girl before she could turn away. Jacquelyn struggled a bit before relaxing, but she still did NOT know what a pet does.

At length, what she needed to do now was to save herself.

Pretty Little Liars vs. Fanfiction.Net Part 3: Hanna's Stealing Problem

2011-09-30T09:22:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

Hanna Marin was the Queen Bee of Rosewood and she knew it. Except for the fact that she hooked up with the resident bad boy Caleb Rivers.

The two were just hanging out at Hanna's house when Aria emailed her, saying, "Spencer has discovered FanFiction.Net. The stories they write about us are atrocious. Be careful."

Caleb said, "Well, let's go check out that site."

They logged onto fanfiction.net and scrolled down to PRETTY LITTLE LIARS. There, they noticed a story titled Sitting on Top of the World by WistfulAshesPassion.

"Let's read it," said Hanna.

Caleb clicked on the story, which read, "Hanna Marin is torn between two men. Will she choose bad-boy Caleb Rivers, or the sweet lovable Michael Montgomery, who is the younger brother of her friend Aria?"

"Really?" Hanna snapped. "They think I'm gonna date Mike? When last I checked, he had issues that he's trying to deal with."

"Who do they think they are?" Caleb snapped. "I'd like to give them a piece of my mind."

Hanna clicked on the words "send PM to author." She stared at a Gmail address. Aria clicked on the address and typed the following message:

"Dear WistfulAshesPassion, Caleb and I belong together; Mike and I are not ever going to date. So leave our relationship alone! Sincerely, Hanna Marin."

Hanna then emailed Aria the story and she said, "How dare they suggest that ludicrous lie? I'm going to make them sorry they ever said that!"

"I know," said Hanna. "First you, then me; now I wonder if Spencer or Emily are next."

"I hope not," said Aria.

Caleb said to her, "These people are going to pay for the crap that they said about you. I'll make sure of that."

But even he didn't foresee the nightmares that would plague him for months to come...

The Twilight Vampire Diaries Crossover Chapter 4

2011-09-30T07:47:00.000-07:00

Katherine, meanwhile, laughed as she escaped from that rainy town. Why on earth would anyone in their right mind name a town Forks? she thought to herself as she sat on the bus, hoping to put some distance between herself and that town.

And hopefully, a dead Elena Gilbert.

Who was she fooling, Katherine thought to herself again. That little popular bitch thought she could take my Stefan away from me. And to even have Damon lusting after her? No. Elena Gilbert deserved to die.

But then she thought about what would happen if anyone were to find out about this. What would Stefan do if he found out that Katherine was behind the reason why Elena was gone? What about Damon? She knew that they could be violent at various times, but even then, they were still in control. But if they ever found out about Elena, then Katherine was dead.

She needed to get help immediately.

------

"Aaaaaarrrrgggghhhhh!!!!" Alice screamed in anger as she walked into the house.

Clothes were strewn everywhere, the still-smashed piano sat in a corner of the room, and most of the pantry was emptied. Bella could not have done that, she thought to herself as she surveyed the mess.

If Esme came home and saw this, then she would surely ground them all for life. And being a vampire, that would mean endless torture.

Alice calmed down and said, "We really need to clean up this place before they get home."

Edward said, "And we better hurry; they'll be here at midnight."

They quickly ran around the house picking up empty coke cans and pizza crusts and vacuuming the floors. Within an hour and a half, the entire house was clean.

"Now who would throw a party and not know that we live here?" Alice said to Charlie.

Charlie said,'"Perhaps it was those kids from the reservation. They apparently thought that they could sneak into your house and destroy it, those little rascals..."

"Is that all we were?" Jacob said as he walked into the room.

"Well," said Charlie, "you did invade someone's property without their knowledge nor consent."

"Ok ok, I admit it, I admit it!" Jacob cried out.

"Indeed," said Edward. "Now, next time you want to throw a party..."

"You will be wise and ask me first," said Alice.

"Yeah, yeah," said Jacob as he walked out the door.

---------

When they reached a place in the woods, Laurent said to Victoria, "Now why did you come? I was handling this very well..."

"But who was that brown haired bitch?" Victoria yelled, cutting Laurent off.

"What brown-haired bitch?" Laurent replied.

"The brown haired bitch who dared to shove me," Victoria shot back. "I have half a mind to tear her to pieces and half a mind to keep going after Bella. Which is it, Laurie?"

Laurent said, "I say we not waste time; Bella cannot always be guarded. Whenever she's alone, we attack."

Victoria said, "But that vampire, I mean bitch-pire, might be around, waiting to strike while we chase after Bella. I say we go after her first."

"Well, she did attack a girl who looked like Bella," said Laurent, "And since we saw the attack, I say we help protect Bella in case she deices to come back."

"One at a time," Victoria smiled at him. "We need to figure out how best to get to Bella. Now that we know...what we know, I'm sure the Cullens would like to find out the truth behind why the other girl was attacked."

Little did they know that a pair of wolf eyes was watching them...

How Bree Tanner Got Her Life Back

2011-09-23T09:00:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

"Take care of that," said Jane to Felix. "I want to go home."

Felix smiled as he pounced on poor Bree. She was doomed. So this is what it feels like to truly die, she thought to herself as she waited for the blow that would send her to her eternal resting place, be it Heaven or Hell.

Just then, a voice yelled out, "WAIT!" They all turned around and saw BELLA staring at them. She said, "Uh, I think you guys should let her live."

"Why should we?" Jane smirked. "After all, she was part of a group of newborns who were programmed to kill you. We don't give second chances."

"Well, what if she could prove her usefulness?" Bella said. "Then can she live?"

"We’ll think about it," said Alec. "But first, let's discuss your future. You must be turned before this year ends or we will destroy you and the Cullen Clan."

"I guess you need to speak to Sam about this," said Carlisle. "But for now, I have a patient to treat."

He took everyone back to the Cullen house and said to Esme, "you need to keep an eye on Bree until I return. We must discuss her fate as a family."

Esme nodded as she watched Carlisle leave. Bella stood up and said, "I believe that you need to talk to Aro before you rush to judgment. Maybe Bree didn't want to be a part of this. I’ve seen people being executed and they didn't agree to be part of the crime that they are accused of. So in this sense, she is innocent until proven guilty."

"Indeed," said Jane as she reached for her cell phone.

-----------------------

At Jacob’s house, the other Wolves gathered around, all waiting word on Jacob’s fate. He had gotten hurt while trying to stop Leah from being killed by a newborn.

At length, Carlisle came out and said, "The worst is over. He’ll be fine in the morning. But Sam, we need to talk."

"Indeed," said Sam. "Why should we?"

"First off, I’m sorry about Leah, but somehow, she was asking for it. You need to say something to Seth. He blames himself for her death," said Carlisle. Sam nodded grimly. Carlisle also said, "We are having a meeting about something, and I think you must be a part of it."

"Indeed," said Sam. "I shall dispatch Embry and Quil to keep an eye on Jacob. But we and the elders wish to see what is going on and mayhaps have our say on this matter."

Seth nodded forlornly; in less than a few weeks, his father and sister were dead. Things just did not go well for the Clearwater family. "I think God hates us," he said. "So that's why He allowed dad and Leah to die."

"God does not hate you," said Carlisle. "He loves you. But your father was in great pain when he died; plus all those fried fatty foods weren’t good for him. but as for Leah, she shouldn't have remained bitter; bitterness has killed more people than hunger and diseases combined."

Sue nodded and said, "So why do we meet at your place?"

"This is important," said Carlisle. "It will impact you as well. I’m trying to lessen the impact for all our sakes."

-------

Bree sat alone in the room; everyone was staring at her. No one knew what to say or do. But the meeting was going to determine whether she would live or die.

Just then, the door opened and Carlisle walked in with the Quileutes following him. The Cullens and Bella turned to see them. Bree gasped as she saw them, knowing that her fate was in their hands…

The True History of the Cullen Family, Part 11

2011-09-23T07:47:00.000-07:00

Heal the Pain

Jasper took Jacquelyn to Marcus's office. The older vampire frowned as he listened to Jacquelyn's sad story about her life. But when he saw the child's scars, anger filled him.

"Who has done this to her?" he snarled. "Name the monster who harmed her and I'll personally tear him apart."

"No one hurt her," said Jasper. "She did that to herself."

"Now why would she do anything like that?" Marcus said.

"Because it was my fault that my mother had died," said Jacquelyn. "And I just couldn't bear to see another child and their mother when my mother is no longer here. I carved her name on my arms so I would never forget what I had lost and to keep from loving someone else who could have adopted me."

"I see," said Marcus. "And it is no less of a tragedy that you are unhappy. But we will have to heal you. You know nothing but pain, not even love."

Jasper said, "Now how will I go about healing her? She's too fragile for...other things."

"She's your pet," said Marcus. "So you can do with her what you wish. Now leave me to my grief."

Jasper stormed away in anger; he should have known that Marcus would use any opportunity to turn the person's grief against him. Jacquelyn did not say anything until they reached Jasper's room.

There, Jasper said to her, "Marcus is a very depressed and violable man. I advise you to steer clear of him if at all possible." He looked at her scars again and said, "You have not forgiven yourself for your mother's death. No child ever deserves to suffer like this."

Jacquelyn found herself crying; she had not cried in years. Not since her mother's funeral. But now, the tears fell from her face and onto her arms, essentially washing away the scars that remained.

Jasper did not notice her crying until he saw her collapse onto the floor and crying profusely. He thought to himself maybe she just needed a good cry. Crying comforts the heart and brings peace to the soul. Women were more prone to crying, he had discovered, and crying was not a sign of weakness, but of strength.

Jasper sat beside Jacquelyn and said nothing as she cried. But for her, her life would never be good. Not if she were to return to the human world. At length, he said, "You feeling all right, little lass?" She shook her head. Jasper then said, "Don't pay no mind to what Marcus says. He may be part of the Volturi, but he shuts himself away from everyone. He even uses his grief as a cloak. But don't let what he says bother you." Jacquelyn nodded, but still refused to speak. Jasper picked up the girl and set her on the bed, wiping away her tears and noting the disappearance of the scars that had been on her arms and hands. "Your mother will never truly leave you," he said as he sat beside the still unhappy girl. Jacquelyn nodded and turned away from him. Jasper sighed, knowing that there was still so much healing for them to go.

--------

Leah was certainly surprised when she saw Jacob, Sam, and several others gathering at Sue's house.

Of course her cruelty would reach the ears of the Elders, but Jacob was still unimpressed. He knew he had to put an end to Leah's cruelty.

"Why are you here?" Leah snapped. "It was already bad enough that you told me that Sam was cheating on me with Emily, but this takes the cake!"

"You destroyed Bella’s marriage," Jacob said in turn. "You betrayed me! You had no right!"

"Like you're any better!" Leah snapped in turn. "Bella’s husband was out of town, and you decided to make a move on her. What were you thinking?"

Sam cut in, saying, "Leah Clearwater, your cruelty has grown over the years, and for some reason, I can't look at you anymore." Paul and Jared stared at her. "We have decided to banish you from La Push."

Sue gasped in horror. "You would banish Leah from La Push? Without consulting the elders? Without consulting me?! I’m her mother!"

"But she forgets her place," said Sam. "For years, I had to put up with her cruelty, but no more. Even her children want her to go away. I don't think there's any hope for her at this point in time."

"She must leave or we will execute her," said Jacob. "And she cannot return at all, not unless she wishes to be killed upon her returning."

Leah couldn't believe her ears; the entire tribe wanted her gone! How could this be? Especially since she was wronged in the first place.

Sam said to her, "You have five seconds to leave or you will die." Leah gasped in horror, but remained rooted to her spot.

Jacob said, “I hope you don’t have a death wish, because I’ll make it come true.”

Leah gasped in horror as she fled from the reservation. She knew that upon her exile, she would be declared dead to the tribe. But little did she know that she would be trapped in another world, one that would be her worst nightmare…

Twilight/Vampire Diaries Crossover, part 3

2011-09-16T08:50:00.000-07:00

Edward saw Alice wrestling Laurent to the ground. He rushedto the other vampire and grabbed him by the throat, snarling, "If I everfound out that you have been hurting Bella, I will not hesitate to kill youright here and right now!"

The other vampire said, "I have never even hurt Bellaat all. Why do you accuse me of that?"

"Maybe because your friend decided to kill Bella,"said Edward. "He thought attacking Bella was all a game to him. Well, it'snot. Bella is worth everything to me!"

Laurent laughed and said, "And if Bella meant so muchto you, then why did you abandon her?"

Edward cringed. "I just wanted to give her a normallife; a life away from the dangers of our world."

"Well, you can't do that," said Victoria as shewalked into the room. "Don't you know that everything about vampires seemsto draw humans in? Now let Laurent go."

Bella stood next to Alice and Alice said, "I thoughtyou were dead."

Victoria said, "You must explain to me why you areunhurt."

Edward said, "I don’t believe that you have any rightto be asking any questions right now. Now leave before I throw you to thewolves."

Little did they know that Charlie was in the room and thathe had just overheard everything. "What is going on here?" he asked.

"I believe that you must answer us this question,"said Laurent. "Do you know this girl?"

"Who? Bella?" said Charlie. "She's mydaughter. Why do you ask?"

"She took someone away from me," said Victoria."She took James away from me."

Bella snapped. "In my defense, he was trying to kill mefirst."

Victoria shot her a hard look before saying, "And whywere you still alive when you should be dead?"

Bella said, "Because unlike you, I know how to treatthe people I love."

Victoria shot her a hard look before storming off. Edwardlet Laurent go and he too walked off, giving them all an angry look. Edwardsaid to Bella, "Did you hear everything that I was saying?"

"Every word," said Bella. "And for therecord, I wasn't really hurt to begin with."

"I'm so happy you're ok!" Edward said as he andBella hugged. Alice cleared her throat. "I'm still here!" sheshouted.

Charlie looked at them and said, "I'll give you somespace." He walked out the room and Alice said to Bella, "Bella, whyare you not hurt?"

"Edward told me to stay safe," said Bella."That meant that I was smart enough to get out of he truck before it wascrushed."

"Bella, who was that vampire?" Alice asked again.

"I don't know; I never saw her before," saidBella. "She pushed a girl into my truck. I don't even know if the girl isalive or dead."

Edward frowned, wishing that he could read Bella's mind. Hewould know which girl she was talking about.

-------------

Speaking of Elena, she woke up in a strange room. She had noidea of who she was, nor would she remember the events that brought her to thisstrange town.

In short, she had lost her memory.

------------------

Dr. Carlisle Cullen was in the hall being fawned upon by thehospital staff and being begged to come back to work in Forks once again.Charlie approached him and said, "I think were in need of yourassistance."

"Why?" asked Carlisle.

"We have a young woman here and we have no idea of whoshe is or where she came from," said Charlie. "So if I'm being rudeto ask you to take care of her..."

"No you're not," said Carlisle. "We wouldlove to. But here is the manner of Bella’s situation for us to deal with. We'vebeen gone for five months and she has gotten hurt. We are back to correcthis."

"Good," said Charlie. He then asked, "Andabout that strange twosome..."

"I'm sure that Emmett would gladly have a good fightwith them," said Alice as she showed up. "Now I want to get home andmake sure that no one has damaged the house while we were gone."

"Well, except for a party that was thrown there withoutmy knowledge nor consent, everything appears to be intact," said Charlie.Alice stared at him for a hard moment.

"WHAT PARTY???"

-----------------

Elena gasped as she sat up in bed. Katherine was gone, hopefullynever to bother her again. But who was Katherine, she thought to herself. Whycan't I remember her? Why can't I remember anything??? Who am I?

She saw a man with gold eyes and blond hair walk into theroom. A younger girl with spiky black hair and gold eyes bounced after him.Another man with brown hair and gold eyes stood at the door.

Gold eyes? Elena thought to herself. Am I in heaven? No,wait! I'm in some rainy town somewhere in the northwest.

The blond man said, "Are you hurt? What is your name?Where are you from?”

Elena gasped in horror as the reality of the situation hither.

She had lost her memory.

The True History of the Cullen Family Chapter 10

2011-09-16T08:27:00.000-07:00

Love Stinks!

Bella Swan found out that her husband, Mike Newton, had been cheating on her.

She packed up their two children, Michael junior and Alexa, and left the home that she shared with her husband. She needed to talk to someone about this immediately.

So she drove off to La Push.

Leah saw her and said, "What happened?"

"Stupid Mike," Bella snapped in anger. "Why did you have to tell me that Mike was cheating on me? Seriously, what do you have against me?" Leah ignored her. "I demand an answer from you!" Bella yelled again.

Leah sighed and walked to her car. "Yeah, just go!" Bella snapped. "Just walk away from me and not care if I am hurt or not! I'm going back to Charlie's."

And with that, Bella stormed away.

Leah turned and saw Bella leaving her house. She wanted to explain herself, but that would mean bringing up Sam and Emily and she was not about to do that at all.

She wondered if her attitude was driving away everyone who loved her. First it was Jacob, who defended her against the pack's cruelty until she betrayed him. Then she alienated Seth and his children during a family gathering. Then she turned a deaf ear to Emily when she was crying. She was crying because her husband had abandoned her and their unlucky children. She became so cold and cruel that Sam refused to talk to her and even their children feared her.

Now it was Bella. Brave, clumsy, and stubborn Bella. Leah knew that Mike had been in an accident and just as he was recovering, he received word that a relative had died. That had him off in some other place helping the family in their time of grief.

Leah Clearwater was definitely the witch of La Push. One that needed to be dealt with or more people in La Push would suffer. She got into her car and headed to Sue's house.

Perhaps her mother knew the answers to her problems.

----------

Jasper frowned as he watched Jacquelyn wake up. She had been asleep nearly all day and she refused to open any curtains. Nor would she allowed any light to shine on her.

She was a tortured soul.

Jasper said to her, "You are not happy."

"As long as my mother is dead, I can never be happy," Jacquelyn said as she stared at her arms.

Ever since she was 8 years old, Jacquelyn had taken to carving her mother's name on her arms. She had done that on many occasions; whenever she saw a happy child and his mother, on her mother's birthday, and on the day that she died. After 7 years, the name IRINA was all over her arms, from her wrists to her shoulders. It was as if Jacquelyn didn't even want to recover from her mother's death.

Jasper reached out and took her hand in his. He saw the name IRINA carved onto her hands, her palms, and every one of her fingers. He said, "Has no doctor offered to remove these welts from your hands?"

"As long as I live, these welts will NOT go away," Jacquelyn said sadly. "My mother is dead. I will never have the happy life that most people living in this world take for granted. If it were, then I would gladly die and rejoin her in Heaven. But I can't. So I resorted to the next best thing."

"What was that?" asked Gus.

"I sought my own end," said Jacquelyn. "It's so easy to die. Poison, being shot or stabbed, a head injury too severe to survive. But then I thought about being a victim of someone else's crime. Maybe I would be ran over by a car in an accident. Knowing that if I died, then at least I would die happy. But here I still am, an unhappy girl now living among vampires. Should one of them unintentionally kill me, I wouldn't mind at all."

Jasper stared at her for a long time. It was hard for this child to talk of her own demise when she survived many years as a foster child. There was a small wonder that she turned to the goth subculture and even to engage in risky behaviors that could mean her own death.

Minerva said, "She's just as broken as he is. We must put them back together."

"I'm not sure if being put back together is the best option for her right now," said Gus. "She'll have to suffer a bit more until she decides that she needs healing."

Jasper took her hand and led her out the door. He needed to talk to someone who understood pain. And if there was anyone in the Volturi who understood pain, it would be Marcus.

At that, a girl's life was at stake.

The "Something Wicked This Way Comes" Rap (parody of the Tron HISHE Rap)

2011-09-16T07:47:00.000-07:00

Cover of Twilight (Twilight, Book 1)

(music starts)

Rapper: Coming straight from fan fiction, take it back to 2008, way before this thing called "Twilight" became great, this story is about vampires, werewolves, and magic, the biggest fan fiction that needs explaining!

Harry: H to the A to the double R-Y! I'm Harry Potter, y'all, and I'm gonna get big! Got kicked through the veil by Bellatrix Lestrange, now I'm in a whole new world, gotta fight to survive! Lil'Jack and Red Ron, yeah, they're my little crew, but something very bad is coming after you; Iusalevand Sinbone, you call him LSB! His evil posse, they don't just suck out all your blood! I don't know how it's all gonna go down, but to stop him, I must join forces with everyone from this book!

Girls: It's Twilight, it's Twilight, it's Twilight!

Rapper: (Vampires!) You know they wanna get Bella, they try to beat her up and down and sideways, but when she and Harry run, LSB and his crew chase them all day (all day)! No time to reload, better grab your stakes and crosses, and shoot your garlic bombs, because in this world, you gotta survive!

Girls: It's Twilight, it's Twilight, it's Twilight!

D.J.: Hold up, wait a minute, let me get this gun reloaded; Hold up, wait a minute, let me get this gun reloaded!

Bella: Yeah, the "Big Bee" I am; I roll with Harry, Ed, and Jake! Bad vampires run around us all the time, and we turn them into a pile of ashes! Oh what's this, you think you're better than me? You think YOU can take down LSB? Well come on, I'll slap you down to size; my name is Bella Swan, you better recognize! (recognize!) Yeah, staking vampires, taking names, Calvernstone thinks he's got more game...vampire, please! This joker is just sad, and his boss is nothing more than a wannabe Dracula! Oh yeah, dude, you know that's true, just watch as Harry throws soup at you...you turn pink! Now that's a crying shame! Now I'll smack you with this lantern as we say my book's name!

Girls: It's Twilight, it's Twilight, it's Twilight!

Rapper: (Werewolves!) You know they wanna get Bella, they try to beat her up and down and sideways, but when she and Harry run, LSB and his crew chase them all day (all day)! No time to reload, better grab your stakes and crosses, and shoot your garlic bombs, because in this world, you gotta survive!

Girls: It's Twilight, it's Twilight, it's Twilight!

D.J.: This next part goes out to those who are offended because Jacquel Romanov was not mentioned, she could have ended this once and for all, no need to call the Volturi, just...(scene changes to reveal Michael Calvernstone attacking 15-year-old Jacquel)

Calvernstone: Hey, little girl, want some candy?

Jacquel: What the F-ARF are you doing at Hogwarts? How old do you think I am? I want you to go away, you stupid jerk! (Calvernstone protests) Shut up, you ugly excuse for a Nosferatu! Go on, get outta here! Don't make me use my wand!

Calvernstone: I have your friend here and...(Jacquel zaps him)

Jacquel: AVADA KEVADRA! (Calvernstone falls down dead. J.K. Rowling shows up)

J.K. Rowling: My goodness, are you all right?

Jacquel: No, I'm not all right! You know what, we're done here! I'm quitting magic for good. (to Dobby) Dobby, get me Stephenie Meyer on the phone; I'd like to negotiate a deal with her.

Harry: That's it? You're walking out on us?

Jacquel: Yeah. I'm getting too old for this crap.

Rapper: But that's no fun to write about! (music begins)

Harry: Yeah, 2008, baby! (Jacquel and Ron dance) We've got a big change up in here! Now where is my vampire cape?

Rapper: Where the cape at? Where the cape?

Harry: Something Wicked This Way Comes, now you Don't Hold Back! Take us out, Dobby! (Dobby plays accordion as the song ends)

The True History of the Cullen Family, Chapter 9

2011-09-09T09:37:00.000-07:00

Here Comes the Rain Again

Jasper frowned as he and the other guards (Alec, Felix, Demetri, and Jane) returned home from another night of "light snacking.” Hopefully, he had his pet to talk to.

Speaking of Jacquelyn, she was still in the room asleep. The snakes were still in the basket. Upon hearing him, Minerva slithered out of the basket and said to him, "You do not seem to enjoy yourself here."

Jasper said to her, "Why would you want to say something crazy about that?"

"You are not happy," Minerva said again.

Jasper frowned as he stared at the tiny snake. Snakes were smart he said to himself, but they are bothersome.

Just then, Jacquelyn woke up and stared at him. Jasper did not know what to do or say. Minerva said to her, "He is broken. He needs to be put back together."

Jacquelyn nodded; now was the time which Minerva said that she would find true love. But would she be able to love a broken vampire?

=========

La Push, Washington

What if the Twilight story never happened?

Leah Clearwater sat sobbing in the kitchen of the house she and Sam Uley had shared. Earlier, she had learned from Jacob Black that her husband had been cheating on her with her own cousin, Emily Young. Emily had been abandoned by her husband Steve Johnson the year before.

What Leah didn't understand was how Sam could have taken advantage of that poor woman like that. Emily had had a child with Down syndrome and another child with autism, plus two children who were albinos and a son who had vitiligo. Emily had been the unluckiest woman in La Push.

Not like Leah, since all her children were born healthy. It was unnatural for any child in La Push to be sick. But that was not the worst of it.

Leah's father, Harry, had just died of a heart attack a few weeks before; the memory of the funeral was still fresh in her mind. She needed to go to her old house and check up on her mother, Sue.

Leah grabbed the car keys and was about to leave when she spotted a red car speeding toward her. It was Bella Swan, who had just left her husband a few hours earlier.

Twilight/Vampire Diaries Crossover, Part 2

2011-09-09T08:16:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

Bella woke up in the hospital. She was sure that she had seen Edward Cullen as she fainted. A vampire stood over her bed. "Edward?" she cried out. "Is that you?"

Just then, the vampire stared at her. "Laurent," he said.

Bella gasped in shock; she had no idea that Laurent was still in Forks. "I thought you were still in Alaska!" she cried out.

"Oh, but I was," said Laurent. "The girls there all loved me. Especially Irina. But I'm here as a favor for Victoria." He smiled as he stared at Bella.

"What?" Bella cried out.

"Victoria wants me to get rid of you," said Laurent. "A mate for a mate. Your Edward killed her James, so it's only fair that you die in return."

Bella cried out, "Why would you take orders from her? She's just a sadistically cruel witch who tells people what to do and doesn't do anything herself!"

Laurent clamped Bella's hand and said, "Calm down, Bella. You don't want your death to be stressful, right?"

"My life is already stressful enough without having death being thrown into the mix," said Bella.

Laurent was unmoved. "I see," he said. "But now you have put me in a quandary. Will I let you live or will I force you to die?"

"Oh, you better let her live..." an angry voice cut into the room.

Bella couldn't be happier to see an angry Alice Cullen standing in the doorway to her room. Alice said to Laurent, "You have five seconds to explain yourself or I'll tear you into pieces!"

-------------

Edward, meanwhile, was in another room. One with a young girl in it. The doctors gathered around her bed, all talking about her injuries. She had many cuts and bruises, a broken leg, and a sprained wrist.

But that wasn't the worst of her injuries.

Edward cried out, "Oh what have I done? I leave you and you get hurt." Charlie stood in the doorway, overhearing everything that Edward was saying. Edward continued, "I'm so so sorry, Bella! I love you!"

Charlie said to him, "That's not Bella."

Edward cried out, "Please don't try to make me feel better! Bella is dead because of me!"

Charlie said, "Bella is over there..."

They both turned and saw Bella trying to get Alice, who had her hands around Laurent's throat. "I'm going to rip you apart!" she screamed.

--------

As for Elena, she was lying in her bed, fighting to live. She knew that Katherine was trying to kill her and by pretending to be dead, Katherine would leave her alone. The trick worked and Elena was safe.

But there were two things wrong with that plan. One of them was that Elena was in a whole new world, one with a different brand of vampires.

Another thing was that she did not know who she was...

Her Final Days Chapter 20

2011-09-09T07:47:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

The storm soon spread to Forks.

Rosalie and Jill gasped in horror as they stared at the clouds. Baby Emmett laughed as he saw the clouds take the form of wolves. Just then, an old Indian came towards them.

Rosalie knew who it was.

Ephraim Black looked at Rosalie. He didn't see an old woman; instead, he saw a beautiful young woman staring at him. Rosalie said, "Ephraim?"

"Rosalie?" Ephraim said. "Why do you live this way? Why do you allow yourself to grow old and alone? Have you forgotten that I loved you?"

"So you did know my grandmother?" Jill cried out. "But this is impossible! If you met her, then she was a young girl. But how did you meet her?"

"At this spot many years ago," said Ephraim. "She was cold, cruel, and very stubborn. She was not pleased to live the life she was living. But I noticed her pain and fixed her broken heart. I put her back together again."

Jill said, "But why are you here?"

"My descendants are needing my wisdom," said Ephraim. "Jacob, his sons, Embry, Ezra, and Jacquelyn are at the edge of their lives. Evil threatens our people; an evil that should not have existed. An evil that should have been destroyed on sight."

"And yet, I made a terrible mistake," said Rosalie. "I was unaware that my choice to trust the witch would destroy my family. But I did. I destroyed my family. I hurt Emmett. I pushed Jacquelyn away from me. I was not thinking clearly when I wished to be mortal. I wanted to live a normal life, but I guess normal isn't for me."

"It is not for you, my dear," said Ephraim. "You have no idea that you have hurt my people as well as your family. I have seen your human family pay for your mistake. Your husband died from poisoning as a result of normal living, your daughter has a health problem that threatens to destroy her and her family, and even your granddaughter has not been living a respectable life because of abuse and rejection. Rosalie, you must correct this mistake before it destroys you forever."

Rosalie gasped in horror as she stared at Ephraim. Jill said, "And how can grandma correct this mistake? She's an old lady; she's going to die soon enough. Can't you have someone else fix this?"

"I can’t," said Ephraim. "Only Rosalie must correct this. And if she fails, then all of this..." he gestured to the woods, "could disappear forever."

Jill gasped in horror as she thought of the world disappearing. There was no way Rosalie could fail, as old as she was. But then came a perplexing question, even for her: "Where is Emmett?"

-----------

The baby laughed as a wolf carried him in the direction of the Cullen house. Inside, Jacquelyn joined Ezra at the window and they stared out into the darkness. Ezra said, "What's going on, mom?"

Jacquelyn said, "This storm is not of nature's making; rather, the spirits of our ancestors have come to us. They come in the hundreds. They are not just Quileutes. They are German as well as English. They have come to warn us."

Sam stared at her. "Warn us about what?" he snapped.

"The witch is returning to collect what is hers," said Jacquelyn. "which is Rosalie. She is alive and yet mortal. I believe the witch is about to make herself known soon. We must be ready."

Just then, Embry heard a baby's laugh outside the front door. He was a small boy with blond hair and green eyes. "I think we've found a lost baby," he said.

"Who is he?" said Sam with a strange look on his face.

"Me Emmett!" the baby laughed as he stared at the old wolves.

"Emmett?" Embry gasped as he saw the baby.

"Uh-oh, it's that baby we saw back at the nursing home!" Ezra said to himself.

Jacquelyn said, "But why would a baby be at the nursing home? He's too young to live there."

"Or his mother could be living there, with her grandmother," Ezra said in turn. "Carter and Elena were there as well."

Embry said, "This is a bad omen; a baby is alone and his mother is not there." He picked up baby Emmett and said, "This is no natural storm; it is the work of evil."

"This is worse than we thought," said Sam. To Jacquelyn, he said, "Whatever skills you live by, now would be the best time to pass them onto us."

Jacquelyn said, "If you insist on fighting in your wolf forms, I can't help you there. But I did have an encounter with someone who can teach you to fight in your spirit forms."

"You don’t mean..." Embry began.

"Taha Aki came to me in a dream before we came back to Forks," said Jacquelyn. "He told me to teach you all to fight in your spirit forms. Only in spirit can we win this fight."

Sam stared at her and said, "He came to you?"

"He is here now," said Jacquelyn. "He cannot appear to you in his mortal body, so he is here in the form of a wolf." They all turned around and saw a huge black wolf staring at them…

-----

Carlisle frowned as he faced the new wolves. Jacob said to them, "They are Charlie and Sue's grandchildren. How and why they are phasing when the Swan family wasn't originally Quileute, we may never know."

Edward said, "We have trouble in our own home; Jacquelyn claims that a wolf has brought a baby to her. Whose child it is, she won't say."

"Then let us go to the Cullen house and see this child," said Paul. "I have a bad feeling that the witch is here."

The Cullens nodded and set off for their house; they hoped that Jacquelyn would be able to hold off until they got there.

-----

Rosalie gasped as Ephraim said to her, "You and your granddaughter are in grave danger, for the witch is here. She wishes to harm you…"

Just then, a cackling voice was heard. "I have you two now," the witch laughed as she used vines to tie up Rosalie and Jill. Jill screamed in horror as she was being taken away...

Pretty Little Liars vs. Fanfiction.Net Part 2: Aria Returns

2011-09-02T10:30:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

Aria Montgomery was sitting at home, with nothing else to do. She decided to check her email.

She logged into her gmail account and it said "You have one new message from spensehastings". She clicked on the message and saw that Spenser had emailed her.

She opened the letter, which said, "Aria, be careful. There are a bunch of sick people looking to damage our reputations, if A isn't already doing that. Don't trust anything these so-called "fan fiction" writers are writing about us. Spense."

Aria shook her head and logged onto fanfiction.net. She then scrolled down to PRETTY LITTLE LIARS. There, she noticed a story titled Where is the Love which was written by a writer named UrLostBoi.

Aria clicked on the story, which read, "Aria and Ezra are dating, but when Jason Dilaurentis shows up, will Aria remain faithful to Ezra or run off with Jason?"

"I don't believe this shit," Aria muttered to herself as she clicked on the words "send PM to author." She stared at a Gmail address. Aria clicked on the address and typed the following message:

"Dear UrLostBoi, Ezra Fitz and I belong together. I don't run off with Jason Dilaurentis. Sincerely, Aria Montgomery"

Aria then emailed Ezra a link to the story. She then emailed Emily and Hanna, asking them if they too had seen any fan fiction written about them. Just then, Spenser emailed her saying, "Did you find out anything about yourself, Ari?"

"Yes", Aria typed back. "Can you believe that jerk tried to pair me off with Jason?"

"What was he thinking?" cried Spenser. "Jason Dilaurentis is a creepy bastard. You would run off with him?"

"That's a lie!" said Aria. "Anyway, did Hanna and Emily receive any emails about fan fiction?"

"I hope not," said Spenser. "I think A's just trying to mess with us as usual."

"But if he/she tries to break me and Ezra up, they're really going to get it," Aria snapped. "So, we're meeting up at lunch tomorrow?"

"Yeah," said Spenser. "I say it's time we found out how they are getting this information about us."

How to Kill a Dark Lord

2011-09-02T07:47:00.001-07:00

Image by WorthingTheatres via Flickr

Title: Top 10 Ways the Dark Lord could die in the 7th Harry Potter book

Author: Jacquel Carey

Date Started: January 29, 2007

Characters: Voldemort

Summary: Here's a nice little list of ways to kill Lord Voldermort...

Genre: Humor, comedy, general

Rating: PG-13 for acts of violence against a dark lord

Warning/Spoilers: contains scenes from other books/movies

Disclaimer: I only own this list

================================

Here's how the Dark Lord could die:

10. His life-force is bound to the One Wand, but when Frodo and Sam take the One Wand to Mount Doom...well, you get the idea.

9. Aslan the Lion pounces on him during that one battle in the Lion, the Witch, & the Wardrobe.

8. When Harry faces Voldemort, Merry stabs him behind the knee, enabling Harry to finish off the Dark Lord.

7. While Voldemort and Harry are fighting, Anakin grabs 2 lightsabers and cuts Voldemort's head off.

6. Wormtail snaps and stabs Voldemort in the back the way Wormtongue stabs Saruman in the back. Voldemort falls off of Orthanc and gets impaled on a spike.

5. Voldemort tortures Harry and Snape grabs him by the neck and throws him down a shaft.

4. Eragon stabs Voldemort in his heart.

3. Voldemort winds up on that Island in "Lost". (well, he kind of deserved that!)

2. Voldemort winds up losing his magic and ends up with the Baudelaires on some crappy island. (ok, he's not dead there but that still counts)

...and the #1 way to kill Lord Voldemort...

1. Well, lets all say the old "I love you man" thing works and Voldemort dies because he's so evil and he can't stand being loved.

================================

All of these possibilities (save for 2) would have been better than the crap we got in Deathly Hallows. Wouldn't you agree?

Boneless No More

2011-09-02T07:47:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

In the final story in the Boneless trilogy, Charlie Bone and Manfred Bloor have returned to their hometown to take a much-needed break.

But bad things happen as soon as they settle into their old lives, as Jacquelyn Ulrich (who they rescued in Boneless at Hogwarts) has resurfaced in a small German village. She sends Charlie a warning that Lord Voldemort is now targeting him in an effort to draw out Harry Potter.

Charlie knows that he and Harry had never gotten along (in fact, Harry nearly kills him and Jacquelyn at one point), but he knows that Harry must be rescued. His friends and Manfred don't agree with this and they say that Harry can fight his own battles.

At this point, a penitent Harry shows up at Jacquelyn’scastle in Lombardi, Germany. She refuses to listen to him and claims that theywere never friends to begin with. She runs off to warn Charlie that Harry’s “repentance”is a trick and that he should be prepared to protect his family at all costs.

Can Charlie go back to a normal life? Will Harry be stoppedonce and for all? Will things in the wizarding world ever change? You’ll findout when you read Boneless No More, the final part in the Boneless Trilogy!

Rated PG-13 for scenes of violence and language

Pretty Little Liars vs. FanFction.Net Part 1: Where is Ali?

2011-08-26T11:23:00.000-07:00

Cover of Pretty Little Liars #4: Unbelievable

Spenser was sitting in her room doing homework when A sent her a message: "Warning, there are some things in the world that should not have been kept a secret. Better find me. -A"

"Stupid A," Spenser muttered to herself as she logged onto fanfiction.net and scrolled down to PRETTY LITTLE LIARS. There, a story caught her attention. It was titled "Ali Was My Sister???" and it was written by a writer named SpringWombat.

Spenser clicked on the story and it read, "Spenser Hastings was the only member in the group who could stand up to Ali DeLaurentis. But did a fight between them cause Ali's death?"

Really, she thought to herself as she read the story.

After the first chapter was over, Spenser clicked on the words "send PM to author." She stared at a Gmail address. Spenser clicked on the address and typed in the first of many emails that she would be writing:

"Dear SpringWombat, how can you even make he assumption that Ali was my sister? And even if it was written in the books, do you really have the right to make up such stuff like this? You need to get a life and stop making up stuff lime that. Sincerely, Spenser Hastings"

Spenser hen logged out of fanfiction.net and emailed Aria, Emily, and Hanna. Maybe they too were dealing with the same thing as well. And if they were, then it was time for the girls to take action. It was already bad enough that A was torturing them, but to have fanfiction writers make up stuff about them was the final straw.

It was time to put an end to this.

Twilight/Vampire Diaries Cross Over

2011-08-26T09:10:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

Here is a story that concerns BOTH the Twilight and VampireDiaries books.

Elena Gilbert was running away from Mystic Falls, Virginia.She could not believe that that bitch Katherine had dared to ruin herrelationship with Stefan Salvatore, nor did she want to hook up with hisyounger brother, Damon. It was time to draw the bitch away from the brothers;anyone who dated two brothers was a whore, Elena thought to herself.

She sighed as she saw a sign that said Welcome to Forks asthe bus drove into Forks, Washington. Now who would name a town Forks? Elenathought to herself. But if Forks was where she could hide, then so be it.

Bella Swan was picking herself back up, much to the reliefof her father, Charlie. But she refused to get over Edward Cullen, and that hadhim worried. He had found some things hidden under her bed and set them out,hoping that she would notice them. Unfortunately, she did not.

Anyway, she was on her way to school when she saw somethingshe did not expect to see: another vampire. This one was dressed in the nicestof clothes, something that Alice herself would wear...if she had lived duringthe 19^th century, that was. Also, the vampire was not very nice,from the way she was chasing that other girl.

Elena saw Katherine and began to run, but the vampire saidto her, "You think that just because you’re pretty and popular that youcan have any guy you want? Stefan was mine first!"

“You whore,” Elena shouted back. “I know you were datingDamon as well. Are you messed up in the head? What self-respecting girl datestwo men who are brothers? You're disgusting!”

Bella gasped as she watched get evil vampire slap the poorgirl across her face. That vampire reminded her of Rosalie. But she had no timeto do anything else but escape as the girl slammed into her truck…

Elena gasped in horror as Katherine slapped her and sent herflying into a truck. As she watched her life flash before her eyes, all shecould think about was Stefan Salvatore. Goodbye, Stefan, Elena thought, as ifher thoughts could reach him. I love you.

Katherine smirked as she watched Elena slam into a truck andfell down, hopefully to die. She then slipped away before anyone could see her.

Alice was dragging Edward back to Forks. She could notbelieve that Edward had the nerve to rip apart their family like that. She wasbringing him back and forcing him to apologize to Bella for hurting her.

But she gasped in horror as she saw paramedics lifting ayoung girl away from a damaged truck. Bella’s red truck. Was Bella hurt?

Bella was feeling dizzy. She tried to stand up, but shecouldn't due to the pain in her head. She gasped as she saw someone walk towardher. "Edward?" she muttered as she fainted.

Here Comes the Rain Again

2011-08-26T07:47:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

Jasper frowned as he and the other guards (Alec, Felix, Demetri, and Jane) returned home from another night of "light snacking". Hopefully, he had his pet to talk to.

Jasper said to her, "Why would you want to say something crazy about that?"

"You are not happy," Minerva said again.

Jasper frowned as he stared at the tiny snake. Snakes were smart he said to himself, but they are bothersome.

Just then, Jacquelyn woke up and stared at him. Jasper did not know what to do or say. Minerva said to her, "He is broken. He needs to be put back together."

Jacquelyn nodded; now was the time which Minerva said that she would find true love. But would she be able to love a broken vampire?

=========

La Push, Washington

What if the Twilight story never happened?

Not like Leah, since all her children were born healthy. It was unnatural for any child in La Push to be sick. But that was not the worst of it.

Leah's father, Harry, had just died of a heart attack a few weeks before; the memory of the funeral was still fresh in her mind. She needed to go to her old house and check up on her mother, Sue.

Leah grabbed the car keys and was about to leave when she spotted a red car speeding toward her. It was Bella Swan, who had just left her husband a few hours earlier.

Pretty Little Liars do Fanfiction

2011-08-19T12:40:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

(OK, so it's my first fan fiction for Pretty Little Liars and I'm a little apprehensive about what could come from the story. But anyway, shall we begin?)

Spenser Hastings, Emily Fields, Aria Montgomery, and Hanna Marin were gathered around in Spenser's room. Just then they received their daily "A" message:

Be careful, bitches. There are people who are making up stories about you. Read them and mock, because only I now the truth about you. Kisses.

~A

"Really?" Spenser said as the other girls nodded. "Now let's see what that bitch is up to."

They got on Emily's laptop and went to FanFiction.Net. They went to the section titled Books and saw the Pretty Little Liars Series site. Then they went to the TV section and saw the words Pretty Little Liars.

Aria was horrified. "What? I break up with Ezra and chase after Jason?" she cried out.

"Emily is dating all of us?" cried Hanna.

"This is what A must have warned us about," said Spenser.

"Those sick bastards!" Emily cried out in horror. Everyone looked at her. "I can't believe that they think I go back to dating boys! I'm a lesbian, Goddamnit!!!"

"Let's tell them how we really feel," said Aria.

"How's about we write to them back and let them know that we don't like some of the stuff they are writing," said Hanna.

"Yup," said Spenser. "If we can't fight A, we can at least go up against the fan fiction writers who need to now how to properly write a story about us."

(So, my friends, beware of the 4 angry girls who will be writing letters of protest against the fan fiction writers. So if you're writing Pretty Little Liars fan fiction, expect the girls to go after you. Let the fun begin!)

What Bella Wants

2011-08-19T09:54:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

Bella Swan was tired of everyone telling her what to do. It seemed like everyone was wanting her to do what they wanted her to do. Jacob Black wanted her to choose him instead of Edward Cullen, knowing full well that he could imprint on another girl. Rosalie, Edward's sister, wanted her to stay human and just be a wife and mother, which Bella thought was pointless. Charlie wanted her to reject Edward and kick him out of her life for leaving her several months earlier.

Bella sat them all down one day and said, "Look, I appreciate what you are all doing for me, but do any of you even take the time to think about what I want?"

"What are you talking about?" said Rosalie.

"You all want me to do things that are good for you, but they aren't right for me," said Bella. To Jacob, she said, "You want me to pick Edward instead of you. But what if you imprint on another girl? I can't face that at all. You'll break my heart the way Sam broke Leah's heart when he imprinted on Emily." Jacob stared at her with wide eyes. He knew that she was right.

Bella said to Rosalie, "And I know you want me to live a human life, but do you think I can do that now that I have experienced your world? Do you not think that God set me on this earth just so I can live a human life? Or He might have had a different reason why I am here. I might want to bring a change to the supernatural world as well. And as for children, do you think I might not want children at all? Not that I don't love children, but I just don't see myself as a mother. And besides, you had your chance to live, but for some reason, you ended up a vampire. Wouldn't it be wise to just get over it and move on?" Rosalie stared at Bella as if Bella had slapped her across her face.

Charlie knew that she would be dealing with him. Better get it over with, he thought to himself. "Dad," Bella was speaking to him now. "I don't understand how you can say that Edward had left me and that should be enough to have me cut him out of my life. Just because people leave us is no excuse to delete them from our lives! What if you realized that you were wrong to let mom go? Would you beg her to take you back?"

Charlie stared at Bella and he knew that she was right. Bella knew that forgiveness was the right thing to do and he knew better than to tell her to reject Edward. "And besides," Bella continued, "do you even consider how much it hurt Edward to have to leave me? He almost killed himself because he left me. Did you not suffer because mom left you? Were you not in any pain?"

Charlie nodded. He had no idea how insightful Bella was.

"And as for you, Rosalie," Bella went back to the vampire sitting in the room, "how can you be so cruel to Edward? You can get mad at him for dating me all you want, but to tell him that I was dead was the most inexcusable and unforgivable thing that you have ever done! And I will be telling Carlisle that the next time I see him."

Bella now turned on Jacob and said, " And if you ever in your life put your hands on me like that again, I will have Edward beat you to death! I will not be forced to make any choices, and especially not by you!"

"So what's the point of having this meeting?" asked Charlie.

Bella said, "Do you ever consider what I really want? I want to live my own life, thank you very much. So what if I don't choose Jacob? It's not that I don't love him, but to me, he's always been a great friend when I needed one. And if I decide to become a vampire, I will deal with the results and not try to hold onto the past. And if I take Edward back, it proves that I'm mature enough to put the petty things that drove us apart aside and rebuild our relationship."

No one had anything else to say to Bella after her speech. It was like she had taken their greedy selfish desires for her and threw them in the trash. At length, Bella said, "I'm going out."

Charlie remained in his seat ling after everyone else had left. Who was he fooling? Bella was his daughter, his stubborn daughter. She would not back down just because everyone had tried to butt into her life. He wondered if he even knew his daughter at all.

Jacob frowned as he wandered around La Push. As much as he hated to admit it, Bella was right. Could they really be together if there was a chance that he could imprint? The wolf would not allow them to be together at all.

Rosalie felt rotten after Bella yelled at her for trying to tell her how to live her life. She too felt bad for what she did, but there would be one other person who was not above giving her a good slap across the face. It was an angry Edward Cullen.

"ROSALIE!!!"

~to be continued

The True History of the Cullen Family, Chapter 8

2011-08-19T07:47:00.000-07:00

Image via Wikipedia

A Child's Tale

That evening, Jacquelyn found herself sitting with the Volturi in the dining room. Even though the ancient vampires had no need to eat human food, Aro had seen to it that Jacquelyn was fed.

He said, "Now tell us your story and so not leave anything out."

Jacquelyn sighed and for the next three hours, she described everything to the old vampires. Her birth; her early life on Fleet Street in London, England; her mother taking her to Italy; her mother's death; her being sent to a foster family; her doubts and fears; her decision to run away; and finally, how she came to find Elbert and make him pay for her mother's death.

Aro smiled and said, "That was a marvelous story! Such a shame about your poor mother; she seemed like a wonderful person."

"I agree," said Caius, "and I would like to add that you did the right thing by coming here. The way I see it, the human world has no place for girls like you, as you have rejected the world's ideas of what a girl should be like."

Marcus frowned and said nothing.

Jasper stood up and said, "You've kept her long enough; I shall take her and retire to my chambers now." He took Jacquelyn and they left the dining hall.

"Such a nice girl," Aro smiled. "I do hope that we see her again soon."

"Not too soon, I hope," Caius said as Jane glared at them both.

---------

As soon as they were back in Jasper's room, Jasper said, "You must be real lucky impressing them. Very few humans who Aro meets escape from him with their humanity intact; not that he won't decide to turn you, of course."

Jacquelyn noticed a bed in the darkest corner of the room and Jasper said, "You should rest here tonight, you must have had a rough journey getting here." She nodded and pulled at the dress, until Jasper slipped the dress over her unnaturally thin shoulders and set it in a chair.

As soon as he was out for another round of light snacking, Minerva crawled out of the basket and said, "How did it go?"

"Not too bad," said Jacquelyn. "But I have a feeling that he is imprisoned in his mind and he must be set free."

"So we shall free him," said Minerva. "But before we free him, we must learn about him so we'll know who and what we're saving him from."

Jacquelyn nodded and crawled into bed; it had been a long day for her and the snakes. But she knew that it was not over yet, not as far as Jasper was concerned...

Don't Hold Back (sequel to Something Wicked This Way Comes)

2011-08-12T14:30:00.000-07:00

History is very fickle, or so they say.

I had much to learn, seeing as I am still in recovering over what had made me very sick a few weeks before. Everyone had come to visit me as often as they could.

But as we all know, people who lived a normal life were cut from history. History isn't for those who were normal, it was written by those who dared to break out of the mold and make something of themselves. there were those who questioned the validity of the world they lived in, those who said no to conventionality, those who lived their lives outside the lines.

They did not hold back at all.

So, in that sense, I wasn't going to hold back at all.

It had been one year since I, Harry Jameson, mysteriously ended up in Forks, Washington. Which was one of the rainiest places in the U.S. I never thought I'd end up staying in Forks and meeting so many people.

Like Edward Cullen.

Edward was a vampire, one who had walked the earth for many years drinking blood. He and I ended up being inseparable from the moment we first met.

Now we are happily together (but very few people, if any, know about the union), but things were complicated between us. Edward was a vampire, and he had been alive for over 100 years. I was just a young boy who was barely coming into adulthood.

Also, there were those who would frown upon our relationship, and others who would go nuts if they knew that we were together. So Edward and I agreed that we would never reveal our relationship to anyone.

And there was the matter of the people living in Forks, and if they ever got wind about myself and Edward, gossip would spread like wildfire.

But would that be enough to keep us quiet about our relationship?

I could not hold back anything else, such as my secret past, which was now being plastered all over various tabloid magazines.

In case you haven't noticed, I was once known as Harry Potter until I ended up in Forks. Many people came to believe that Harry Potter was dead when they did not now that he was really Harry Sheppherd Jameson, who had been kidnapped when he was an infant and sent to wizarding parents, who eventually die and he is sent to an abusive foster family and forced to attend a wretched boarding school in England.

I was happy to break free from that life and come here.

At present, I was in my room, hoping to slip out today and enjoy myself. It was the last day of school and I wanted to live it up before summer vacation began.

If summer even existed in Forks to begin with.

I just can't hold back.

Her Final Days, Chapter 19

2011-08-12T10:20:00.000-07:00

Image by VancityAllie via Flickr

Rosalie stepped out of the car and walked into the graveyard. Jill said, "Now why are we in a cemetery?"

Rosalie said, "Because this was where Ephraim was buried. His people have often claimed that he still walks here, but no one has actually seen him."

Jill said, "Now why are we really in some Native American burial place?"

Rosalie frowned and began to let her mind wander...

(FLASHBACK)

LA PUSH, WASHINGTON

1936

Rosalie could hardly believe herself. One minute, she was angry and jealous, but the next minute, she was kissing Ephraim Black. This would not do at all.

Edward had confronted her about it later that day and warned her to stay away from the Quileute wolf. Ephraim could imprint at any time, and she had Emmett.

But she did not care; Rosalie had never felt this excited in years. it was like she had discovered the best thing in her life (save for the idea of love and marriage, that was).

Within a few days after that fateful kiss, Ephraim met with Carlisle and had him tell the tribe his life story. He even made Edward, Esme, Emmett, and Rosalie tell their life stories as well. Belle frowned, wondering why the blond girl had to describe the riches of high society when her mother and grandmother gave up that life years before she herself was born.

At length, the oldest member of the tribe stood up and said, "Now, this is intriguing. You say you are vampires, but you have not consumed human blood. Even if our greatest chief was alive, he too would be in this predicament. You must stay here for a few more days while we deal with this."

Everyone was surprised, but William jumped around in joy; he was really getting attached to the Cullens, especially Emmett. Belle frowned, but she stared at Carlisle and Esme. Edward remained distant from everyone else, but Rosalie was conflicted. On one hand, she was a vampire and a Cullen, but for some reason, she had kissed Ephraim Black. This could be a problem if anyone were to find out.

(END FLASHBACK)

Rosalie stopped in front of a grave and said to Jill, "This is where they buried him after his death." Jill read the words:

"Here lies Ephraim Black

Alpha Wolf and Chief of the Quileute Tribe

First ally of the Cullen Clan

March 18, 1890-May 17, 1972"

Rosalie said, "He died years after my family had met him; he was old."

"So why are we here?" Jill asked.

"He is coming to us," Rosalie said as she stared at a dark cloud that lingered over the horizon. The sky was turning dark in anticipation of a great storm...

--------

Sam frowned as he opened the door to the Cullen house and found Jacquelyn in the kitchen preparing breakfast. Ezra was still asleep; she would wake him up soon.

Sam said, "I've been wondering if you had a fling with Embry and that's why Ezra is here."

"Be careful of how you word that, Sam," Jacquelyn snapped as she stared at him.

"I know there's something going on between you and him," Sam said. "I know that Ezra is Quileute, and you are the descendant of Isabella Braumlein, whose grandfather was also Quileute. Why do you deny your heritage?"

"I don't," said Jacquelyn, "but I believe that you are overstepping your boundaries. Your tribe is keeping something important from me and I want to know what it is. If my family is Quileute, then I need to know about my legacy so I can pass it on to Ezra."

Embry stood at the door with an angry look on his face; he was not pleased to see Sam. Ezra was staring at the window, noticing that a great storm was about to occur...

The True History of the Cullen Family, Chapter 7

2011-08-12T07:47:00.000-07:00

Total Eclipse of the Heart

Jacquelyn found herself being taken to the baths that were located behind the castle. Gus and Minerva remained hidden in her bag. None of them realized that the next hour of their lives would be their last...

Aro smiled at Jasper and said, "So, how did we do? Do you like your new pet?"

"I do," said Jasper.

Caius glared at them and said, "This isn't right what you are doing, Aro. This pet, she's too young for us and on top of that, she knows too much about vampires. We have to stop this before it goes too far."

Marcus said, "But what of the old days when we once kept humans as pets? Were we not so different from him? He needs her and she needs him. I have a feeling that we will need her."

"Indeed," said Caius as he sat on his throne. "Now someone fetch me a snack; I'm feeling peckish." Immediately, a human was brought to the Volturi.

"Elbert Braun," Aro said as he laid eyes in the man. "Did you know that we've been after you for twenty years?"

Marcus said, "You were responsible for the disaster at the hotel eight years ago."

"Releasing that snake into the hotel lobby was a bad idea," Caius hissed at Elbert. "One little girl lost her mother as a result of your stupidity. Now you must die."

Elbert screamed in horror as the vampires pounced on him...

_____________

Jacquelyn stood in the middle of what appeared to be a large bedroom. It's a tomblike room, but quite almost lightless. The walls are covered in graffiti, broken up by heavy, springtime green curtains on the windows.Minerva gasped as she slid out of the bag and saw Jacquelyn. Her hair was washed until it returned to it's dark color, her skin was moon-pale, and most of her jewelry gleamed in the sunlight.

Gus said, "Well, we're now stuck in a vampire's den. How are we going to escape this time?"

"We don't," said Minerva. "Remember, Jacquelyn must heal a man who needs love. If we leave now, she'll never find true love."

"Yeah, yeah," Gus muttered as Jacquelyn walked into the room. She said, "What do we do now?"

Jasper walked into the room. It was now evening, and Jacquelyn had shared her dinner with Gus and Minerva a few hours earlier. He said, "I take it that you're my new pet."

"What? Like a lap dog?" Gus smirked.

Jasper glared at him. "Not like a lap dog."

"What are you talking about then?" Minerva said.

"I need a human pet," said Jasper, "and she's it."

Minerva was angry. "She's a girl, not an animal!"

"But she'll be my pet nonetheless," said Jasper, "so you rattlesnakes better be nice."

"We're not rattlesnakes!" Gus yelled in anger, but they all gasped as they saw Jacquelyn walking towards them wearing a beautiful dress. This charming lavender chiffon gown, woven with ferns, seems to have been made for a little girl. Jasper frowned; he'd have to have a word with the wives later.

Jacquelyn said, "So I take it that you have met Gus and Minerva?"

"Well," said Jasper, "they don't seem to be welcoming me very much."

"I wonder why," Jacquelyn said as she approached him.

Jasper found himself smiling in excitement; this girl was a rare beauty, even if she seemed to favor dark clothing.

Minerva hissed at Jasper and crawled into a huge basket that sat in the corner of the room. Gus followed his sister while giving Jacquel a sad look. Jasper smiled and said, "Come with me."

Jacquelyn nodded, but she was nervous. She had no idea of what she had gotten herself into; especially now that she was among vampires. Jasper reached over and took her hand, guiding her to the door. The door that led to their future...